I don’t think that women are preoccupied in Afghanistan and that is the reason that most don’t stand firm in opposition. But I understand your statement, ZL. Although, I don’t currently have dreads I have thought of going that style direction.

Our previous generations in Amerika did the hard fighting and we have no idea what it is like to live in a constant state of fear. That is likened to the slaves in pre Civil War Amerika. What the men AND women of this country can do is step up to the political pulpit using the freedom of speech (like the credit rating companies are doing now…but that is a different story) and call or write their politicians to tell them we should set a standard for the world of ethics. I just had a laugh as I wrote that. Amerika, asking politicians to make our country to be the country of ethics? We could start by talking with Joe Lieberman… But, we can make our voices heard nonetheless to state that the world should spend more political time discussing and healing the human rights policies of other countries more than ignoring them and doing the business of the day. It is well documented that when people are happy their society flourishes, not strictly financially, but in all aspects of the human condition. The thought of too big to fail, is the same as us doing business with Isreal, China, Russia, Afghanistan and so many others that show our country’s ethos.

For lack of a better phrase, it was stated in the movie Wall Street, “Greed is good.” This is the mantra of our country, as it was the empire of Rome. And we see where that ended up…Our world does not need to revolve and evolve around this negative philosophy and ethos. Our world revolves around an ethos that means nothing. Our global society has based its motion on something that is meaningless. Money. This money begets power which begets greed which begets corruption and so on. If humans we no longer around on this planet, it would still spin and life would continue. Our own arrogance has created a system of beliefs that hurt, anger, stifle, mame, denegrate, enslave others for the benefit of few. If money weren’t around we humans would have to interact more together as a specie in order to survive. Money separates our specie to become, as Michelle pointed out from her other article, emotionless.

When I am in a gathering I do get asked what my wife does. I enjoy telling people what we do. Most people talk about their jobs as if it is their life, but I talk about our life and then follow with whatever work is going on at the time. Most people do not know how to respond to that.

Men are not the ‘prize’ my dear females, so why is there such a premium on having one? Have you asked yourself that? First questions women ask of other women, are you seeing anyone (if no) why not (if yes) what does he do (bc that might be more important than what you do? Why?) do men ever ask other men that question? Not in my experience, it’s a non-relevant sitch, if it comes up it comes up, but it isn’t first ten minute convo protocol. How about this q: how do YOU balance work/home life? ha! But that’s all Western sensibilities, and do not get me going on this (while I still do dig men, might be switching teams given the limited pool of men we’re dealing with who are ‘good and ‘real’) if I keep talking. Btw, Boggzy, I met your twin on the Palos Verdes cliffs today, only he had long dreadlocks, you in an alternate state : )

If I were from anywhere else but Western countries I would ask Madaline to off them all, too. There is no improving them, they just don’t get it and never will. In Indo, women can’t wear tight jeans anymore (Jan 1 start date) but men will argue that men cannot wear shorts anymore either…yes, but women will be admonished and beaten for the offense, what will happen to men who do the shorts wearing anyway, probably a slap on the wrist and a wink/nod.

What do you do though? Off all men? How do we judge who’s a ‘good’ or ‘real’ man anymore? We all know there aren’t that many Anonz’s out there and even he will readily admit he wasn’t always like he is now, seems to be atoning quite nicely in the recent year or so though, no? would we have any males left?

Caroline, so glad your feeling the effects and 21 strong, that makes me proud, of all of you!

Reba, yes that is one of the perks ; ) and that is a good feeling. I have had friends male and female tell me how good I look coming and going : )

…and I get serious gratification from the women here who report in and real life pals who submit and do the program, that’s fun bc I see their results live. It is work and it is a commitment and it is a new mind set, especially if you really like your liquor and processed foods, it’s hard at first, once done and the cravings for certain foods and bevvies end and you feel and look great you hardly recall what that was like anymore. Don’t know about any of you but I get offers to parties, to go out for drinks, etc…no one even notices that I’m not drinking but if they ask I tell them. I guess I must’ve been a hell of a martini drinker before bc they look at me like I’ve gone mad : ) the truth is I just don’t remember them days no mo’! I’m not opposed to a drinkie here and there but facts are facts, it slows the metabolism and is a weight changer for most people, for women going into that peri-menapause or menopause it is a crucial factor in preventing hot flashes. Which brings me to my point for next week, we’ll be adding a couple of weight training exercises so get yourselves a set of 2 & 5 lb weights, you don’t need heavier with the ZL technique, you need to move slow and deliberate with total body focus, so there’s that : ) but has everyone been keeping a food journal? Been eating like a Vegatarian 2 meals/days a week?

Other purchases: olive oil (organic, first cold press is best), flaxseed oil (refridgerate this) and organic cocunut oil (excellent for cooking and perfect for sunning and after showering, just wipe excess off bc it will stain clothes if left on skin surface) so you may pay more for these items but at least you’ll get good skin and good cooking out of the deal.

Here’s how to convert to brown rice and love it – in the cooking water add one chicken or vegetable bouilion cube, a large teaspoon of tumeric, 2 large tablespoons of cocunut oil, several strands of saffron and white pepper, when it boils, add your rice and cover/simmer as usual, it’s so tasty die-hard brown rice haters will be saying yumyum, you can also make this with wild/long grain rice, very tasty also. Serve it up with some steamed veggies and add Bragg’s amino acids if you want to.

We’ll be talking about the health benfits of garlic soon also, I’m going to tell you that great food and health are very interconnected and so my search goes on for justifying the supplements but I’ll agree to this: women need calcium/magnesium 1600mgs a day, vite D3 also. I highly recommend some chinese herbal supplements (pure of form of course) and I’ll give those later this week or next, overload is exactly what I don’t want to do to you, it all has to blend easily into your lifestyle and that takes time, and energetically speaking, it requires an internal shift, I’m quite sure that if you’re really following all this that your feeling very strong internally as well and able to step aside from your ego and get better perspective on things that once felt very subjective, am I correct? You tell me if you understand that statement and/or if that is occuring for you, bc if it isn’t I will step up the mind/spirit element of this program ; ) I owe you all that much and more…

Caio, Zen Lill

PS sorry for the length…

Perhaps money can’t buy happiness — but it’s all too obvious these days that spending more than you have can bring misery, and cause stress and anxiety that take a toll on your health. Fortunately, help can be had with a new form of therapy that specifically treats what Brad Klontz, PsyD, coauthor with Ted Klontz, PhD, of Mind Over Money: Overcoming the Money Disorders That Threaten Our Financial Health (to be published in December 2009), calls “money disorders.”

HIGH FINANCIAL ANXIETY

Even before the recession, nearly 75% of Americans identified money as the number-one source of stress in their lives. At present, the average American household owes more than $10,000 in credit card debt and saves at a relatively low rate of about 5%. Given these numbers, it’s not surprising to learn that many suffer from money disorders, such as overspending, serial borrowing, compulsive gambling, workaholism, underspending (Depression Era mentality or hoarding), financial dependence or financial infidelity (withholding financial information from a significant other).

“Financial therapy goes beyond the balance sheet to uncover the root causes of money disorders,” Dr. Klontz said. The goal is to identify your “money scripts” — unconscious beliefs associated with money that drive your financial behavior — which in turn helps remove psychological barriers to changing your relationship with money, and enables you to eventually improve your financial health.

CHANGE YOUR MONEY SCRIPT

It’s not the lack of funds that is the problem — with money disorders, Dr. Klontz points out that financial problems are the symptom, not the disease. In most cases, early childhood experiences around money lead to a set of problematic money scripts that create problems in your adult life. The first step is being honest with yourself about your financial problems and making a commitment to change.

People who routinely overspend or avoid dealing with their finances are following what Dr. Klontz calls “poor scripts.” Poor scripts include statements such as, “My net worth is equal to my self-worth” … “It’s okay to keep secrets about money from my spouse” … “The more money I have, the happier I will be.” In his practice and at workshops, Dr. Klontz helps people change their “poor scripts” to “wealth scripts” — such as “It’s important to save money for a rainy day” and “Giving money to others who are in need is something people should do.” You have the ability to change your own money mind-set, he stresses. Creating a new script to recite to yourself eventually transforms it to your new reality, which is how you change your financial trajectory. “Regardless of your starting point or your current financial situation, you can quite literally rewire your brain for wealth,” says Dr. Klontz.

To help people get to the bottom of their money disorders, Dr. Klontz and his team conduct workshops (www.onsiteworkshops.com) around the country. A psychotherapist and a certified financial planner (CFP) run each intensive six-day program. The programs include experiential therapy, in which participants explore past experiences with money to work through unresolved conflicts and emotions about it… practical lectures from a financial planner on risk management, tax strategies and retirement planning… and 45 minutes a day of mindful meditation to reduce anxiety.

WHEN TO SEEK HELP

If you know what you should be doing with your money and just can’t seem to do it… if your financial behavior feels out of control… or if you are suffering from significant emotional, social (e.g., relationship problems) or financial consequences of your behavior, it’s time to seek help. According to Dr. Koontz, warning signs include…

Anxiety, worry or despair about your financial situation.
Lack of savings.
Extensive debt or filing for bankruptcy.
Conflict with family or friends about money.
Compulsive spending or its opposite, hoarding.
Financial dependence or excessive risk-taking.
WHERE TO SEEK HELP

Financial therapy is still a very new field, and Dr. Klontz notes that at present there is no established accreditation — although he and his colleagues are working on this. He has trained dozens of therapists and financial planners around the country and has set up a referral list at http://www.yourmentalwealth.com, where you can also take a financial health test to gauge the relative severity of your issues if you are feeling stressed about money .

There are other options, too — you may be able to find a local therapist who works in financial psychology by asking financial planners for a referral. Some people find it useful to see both a therapist and a financial planner — but this can be expensive. Another solution is to investigate free self-help groups, meditation classes and lectures at local community centers and places of worship. All around the country, people who have been downsized or face other financial setbacks are banding together to help each other develop new marketable skills and find new ways to make ends meet. Of course, it is challenging… but it also is an opportunity to change your money script and get on the right path to financial wellness.

Source(s):

Brad Klontz, PsyD, a financial psychologist in Kapaa, Hawaii, and coauthor with Ted Klontz, PhD, of the upcoming Mind Over Money: Overcoming the Money Disorders That Threaten Our Financial Health, December 2009. Dr. Klontz is cofounder of Your Mental Wealth™. Visit Dr. Klontz’s Web sites at http://www.YourMentalWealth.com and http://www.KlontzConsulting.com.

Your article was so poignant about the indifference of men. Can anyone imagine the terror of that child with men watching and cheering while 10 men took turns raping her for two hours?

What does it say about our humanity? I’m not saying I believe in aliens, but I can certainly agree with you Michelle. If there were aliens how could they possibly mistake us for beings with higher intelligence or something worthy of compassion?

Howie and Al, were are your helpful, encouraging comments now? Does the plight of women or even a 15 year old female child bother you enough to elicit a sympathetic comment? Or is it only things in which a male might lose a life or limb that arouse your concerns?

Ramona

I watch a comedy special on HBO. It brought this joke to mind.
———————————————–
A man wakes up in the hospital, badaged from head to foot. The doctor
comes in and says, “Well, I see you’ve regained consciousness. Now, you
probably won’t remember, but you were in a pile-up on the freeway. You’re
going to be okay, you’ll walk again and everything, but something happened.
I’m trying to break this gently, but the fact is, your willy was chopped off in
the wreck, and we were unable to find it.”

The man groans, but the doctor goes on, “You’ve got $9000 in insurance
compensation coming, and we now have the technology to build you a new
willy that will work as well as your old one did – better in fact! But the thing
is, it doesn’t come cheap. It’s $1000 an inch.” The man perks up at this.

“So,” continues the doctor, “it’s for you to decide how many inches you want.
But it’s something you’d better discuss with your wife. I mean, if you had a five
inch one before, and you decide to go for a nine incher, she might be a bit put out.
But if you had a nine inch one before, and you decide only to invest in a five
incher this time, she might be disappointed. So it’s important that she plays a role
in helping you make the decision.”

The man agrees to talk with his wife. The doctor comes back the next day.

“So,” says the doctor, “have you spoken with your wife?”

“I have,” says the man.

“And what is the decision?” asks the doctor.

“We’re getting granite countertops.”
———————————-

Lisa