Crying, Compromise, and Tax Cuts
Posted by Michelle Moquin on December 13th, 2010
Good morning!
Ha! I love it when Anonz chimes in. My number of comments always go up, and the focus isn’t on me or what I’ve blogged. Makes my following morning write so much easier when most of the comments are directed toward… “The Nobleman”. :)
So speaking of my morning write – what is going on? So much to chitchat about.
We watched 60 minutes last night – did any of you watch it? Did you catch cry-baby Boehner? Is that too harsh on a man who is just showing us his soft side? Maybe I should lighten up and address him as Boo-Hoo Boehner. Stil harsh?
Look, I don’t knock a man who cries – I think everybody should be able to have a good cry now and then. I think crying is good. (I certainly do. More often than I like – hey, it’s a great stress reliever.:)
But it seems lately that every time John Boehner appears on TV, in public, he gets chocked up and tears start streaming. I know he is an emotional guy…
And I also know, that if a woman politician showed her soft side so often, chocking up, tears streaming down her face, she would be known throughout the political world as being too soft…too emotional, she won’t be able to handle the job. (And we’ve also heard negative comments when a woman is too strong. Ugh!) But what about Boehner? How will he be perceived? Well…I guess his tears, in time, will eventually tell.
Thoughts? Are you moved by his emotions? Do you buy it or ??
And what about Boehner’s thoughts on “Compromise”? Not a word in his vocabulary. He rejects the word.
Boehner: When you say the word “compromise,” a lot of Americans look up and go, “Uh-oh, they’re gonna sell me out.” And so finding common ground, I think, makes more sense.
Uh..Okay.
What are your thoughts about the Bush tax cuts?
Will the tax cuts plan pass? That is the big question for today.
First Senate vote expected on Obama-GOP tax deal
WASHINGTON – Senators get their first chance Monday to vote on the tax-cut deal struck by President Barack Obama and Republicans, but whatever the outcome of the test vote, the White House expects the bill to pass by year’s end.
“Everybody understands what it would mean for the economy if we don’t get this done,” Obama adviser David Axelrod said Sunday.
The No. 2 Senate Democrat, Dick Durbin of Illinois, said a “good cross-section” of senators in his party are ready to accept the deal.
The legislation would avert a Jan. 1 increase in income taxes for nearly all Americans, including middle and high earners. The package also would renew a program of jobless benefits for the long-term unemployed and put in place a one-year cut in Social Security taxes.
“We believe that when it comes back to the House, that we will get a vote, and that we’ll prevail there, because at the end of the day, no one wants to see taxes go up on 150 million Americans” on New Year’s Day, Axelrod said. “No one wants to see 2 million people lose their unemployment insurance.”
While many House Democrats have criticized the tax deal, Axelrod said he didn’t foresee “major changes” being made by the House.
Maryland Rep. Chris Van Hollen, a member of the Democratic leadership who represented the House in negotiations with the administration, made clear that Democrats strongly object to extending breaks to estates as large as $5 million. He said the package will be taken up in the House in some form, but there would be an effort to change the estate tax provision.
“We’re not talking about blocking the whole thing,” Van Hollen said.
At the insistence of Republicans, the plan includes a more generous estate tax provision: The first $5 million of a couple’s estate could pass to heirs without taxation, and an additional $5 million for the spouse. The balance would be subject to a 35 percent tax rate.
That provision infuriated Democrats who are already unhappy with Obama for agreeing to extend tax cuts at incomes of more than $200,000 for individuals and $250,000 for couples, and who say the tax breaks will unnecessarily add to the rising federal deficit. In all, the package would cost about $855 billion, according to a preliminary congressional estimate.
Axelrod spoke on ABC’s “This Week,” CBS’ “Face the Nation” and CNN’s “State of the Union.” Van Hollen appeared on “Fox News Sunday” and Durbin was on CNN.
**********
Readers: Interested in hearing what White House Senior Advisor David Axelrod say about the tax plan? Click here for an interview. I found it quite interesting.
Anything else you want to chat about? Blog me.
Nancy: Loved your comment. There is not a call for girls right now but stay tuned and keep reading. When more girls are needed, I will always announce it here. Don’t give up the studying. We could always use more intelligent women economists.
Philby: I have yet to read the General Info entry so I can not make an intelligent comment. But I will say, in response to your comment, that there is nothing wrong working for fast food companies. And I appreciate those that do and enjoy it, because there is a need for that kind of work. But there is never a need to apologize for ranting here. Rant on as you feel the need. :)
Elliot: I don’t have any expectations of my readers. They come here for a variety of reasons. Read what you like, and don’t read what you don’t. It’s really that simple.
Mary: Anonz hasn’t been here in quite some time. So I suggest you read the archives at least 9 months back, maybe more. And, even though it was a long time ago, I am still sorry for your loss.
Peace out.
Lastly, greed over a great story is surfacing from my “loyal”(?) readers. With all this back and forth about who owns what, that appears on my blog, let me reiterate that all material posted on my blog becomes the sole property of my blog. If you want to reserve any proprietary rights don’t post it to my blog. I will prominently display this caveat on my blog from now on to remind those who may have forgotten this notice.
Gratefully your blog host,
michelle
Aka BABE: We all know what this means by now :)
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December 13th, 2010 at 12:49 pm
The Secrets to Strong Friendships at Any Age
Jeffrey Zaslow
Friendship is good for mental and physical health — research shows that having close friends raises self-esteem, boosts immunity and improves sleep.
A study from Flinders University in Australia even found that people with many close friends live longer than those with few friends.
Friendships begun in childhood are especially powerful, providing a connection to the experiences that have made us who we are.
Best-selling writer Jeffrey Zaslow spent two years getting to know a close-knit group of women, now in their 40s, who met as girls in Ames, Iowa.
As the 11 women moved to different states, pursued careers, married and became mothers, they maintained a powerful bond that has endured to this day.
Bottom Line/Personal talked to Zaslow to find out what the girls from Ames can teach us all about developing strong friendships at any age…
What is different about the Ames girls that has allowed their friendship to last so long? They are not as unusual as you might think.
I first learned about this group of women after writing a Wall Street Journal column about turning points in women’s friendships.
Hundreds of readers wrote to me in response, describing their own lifelong friendships. Jenny — one of the girls from Ames — was among them.
I was surprised at how many people I heard from who had been able to keep their friendships strong over the years.
What do long-term friendships give us that short-term ones don’t? Newer friends may know us in a limited context — as colleagues, as volunteers, or as someone’s spouse or parent.
Friends from childhood or college have a fuller picture of us. They see beyond the roles that we have assumed in life. They see the ways that we have changed and the qualities in us that have not changed.
Longtime friends can provide a greater depth of emotional support during difficult times.
For example, when Marilyn’s father developed Alzheimer’s disease, her newer friends in Minnesota knew her father only as someone with dementia.
Her friends from Ames remembered him as the beloved pediatrician who often gave them wise, practical advice and served the community with dedication for many years. These memories were a great comfort to her.
How are men’s friendships different from women’s? According to research, men continue building friendships until around age 30, after which the number of friends steadily declines.
Men then tend to get their emotional needs met by their wives.
In contrast, women tend to neglect their friendships most in their 20s and 30s, while they are raising young children, but return to them when they reach their 40s and beyond.
One dramatic difference between men’s and women’s friendships is that women build trust by talking about highly personal topics.
Men’s conversations with one another tend to be less personal — they bond by doing things together.
How can people go about reconnecting with old friends? Technology can help. Look up your old friends on Facebook.com or through your alumni association’s database.
There even are Web sites, such as Classmates.com, designed to help you find old friends. Then send an e-mail or a note — a few paragraphs catching the person up on your work and family or news from your old town or school.
You may have fewer interests in common with older friends than with newer friends. Focus on the commonalities — the history and memories that you share.
Keep expectations modest, and read the social signals. If your five-paragraph missive about your life gets a one-sentence reply, don’t take it personally. Accept that the timing or the match may not be right, and reach out to other old friends.
Can friendships formed in adulthood ever be as strong as friendships begun earlier in life?
While there is no substitute for the people who knew you when, we live long lives, and a friend you make later in life is one you can potentially value for years.
THE 6 KEYS TO FRIENDSHIP
The Ames friends share a number of unspoken ground rules that are crucial to maintaining trust and connection in any friendship…
1. Work at staying connected. The friends are in e-mail contact with one another nearly every day, hitting “reply all” to keep the whole group in the loop.
They get together as a full group at least once a year and in smaller groups several times a year.
2. Root for one another. They celebrate one another’s successes, sending cards, flowers and congratulatory e-mails.
Sometimes they feel envious, but they don’t undercut one another. They recognize that friendship is not a competition and take pleasure in one another’s good fortune.
3. Don’t gloat. They don’t boast about their incomes or their spouses’ incomes. When they talk about their children’s achievements, they don’t do it in a competitive or domineering way.
4. Show up for important events. In 1986, Sheila, one of the 11 friends, died in a fall. The women were in their 20s, spread across the country, and only half of them could afford to travel back to Ames for the funeral.
Those who didn’t attend still regret that they weren’t able to show support for Sheila’s family or get closure.
Years later, when Karla’s teenage daughter died after a long illness, every Ames girl came to the memorial service.
The friends make a point of being present for the landmark events in one another’s lives — from weddings to serious illnesses and funerals.
5. Be flexible and understanding. The friends recognize that people’s needs and capacities ebb and flow. While they expect loyalty and goodwill from one another, they don’t demand constant attention.
If an e-mail or a phone call isn’t returned right away, they don’t get resentful or worry that they’re being snubbed. They give one another room to live full lives and be busy and tired.
They also are generous when one member of the circle needs more attention than usual. When Kelly was going through a divorce, the others listened for as long as she needed to talk.
6. Protect confidences. Secrets shared among group members stay within the group. Disagreements with one another also get hashed out within the group — they don’t complain to spouses or to other friends.
Example: The biggest disagreement the girls hashed out with one another was how much to share of themselves in the book.
Some girls shared more private details about themselves (and the relationship and their friends) than others were comfortable with.
There were times when feelings were bruised, and they had to reach a consensus on how much from their diaries and letters they were willing to share for inclusion in the book.
Personal interviewed Jeffrey Zaslow, who is based in Southfield, Michigan, and writes a column on life transitions for The Wall Street Journal.
For 14 years, he wrote an advice column for the Chicago Sun-Times after winning a competition to replace Ann Landers. He is coauthor of the best-selling book The Last Lecture (Hyperion). His most recent book, The Girls from Ames (Gotham), also is a best seller. http://www.girlsfromames.com.
December 13th, 2010 at 8:42 pm
Hi Mischa, he seems moved by whatever causes his waterworks and some would call it emotional or passion about a subject, though I dare say that if he were a she he (she) would probably be labeled incapable of containing her emotionals and therefore subliminally the idea would be – she’s weak, irrational and possibly even hormonal (collective gasp) hahaha…though looking at the past few hundy years, who’s irrational and possibly hormonal?! It hasn’t been women running the show so, uh, that only points at one gender : ) maybe y’all could use some estrogen in the room (white house).
I wanted to share some pointers on running into a friend at a party that has recently (or not so recently but you know no details) separated, if they don’t talk about it, stop asking questions. It makes sense to me now why people I know have gone underground when they divorced. People are well meaning (some not so much, just seriously nosy) and so I played polite, that is – smile & change subject, but here’s my favorite boneheaded q’s: where you having sex? (hmmm, when(?) at the time of deciding to separate(?) that would be an obvious no, no?) That’s what was going through my head, what I said out loud was: (laughing) who needs to KNOW that tid-bit of info? (change subject). How f’in stupid. The other winner was (after I told this person that we got along well) well, if you get along so well why aren’t you putting it back together? (excuse me? Fuck you and the horse you rode in on) Out loud I said, why would you ask me a question like that? Her response: Oh well I was just making conversation. (Hmm, maybe you should consider taking a vow of silence instead?).
On the other hand, a sincere question was asked and by the look in her eyes I could tell she was just concerned about my well being, I answered as succintly as possible.
My point: unless you genuinely care about the parties involved (if you do, you would’ve had your story awhile ago though, no? Be honest) so, don’t ask questions just to know the scoop, you’re interviewee can feel that and it doesn’t feel very good, you wouldn’t want to be on the receiving end. I do believe that people just feel the need to acknowledge your lack of your usual partner. I get that. It’s kind of like having cancer, (gee, should I talk about it openly or not talk about it, what to do, what to do…), but methinks some might just feel threatened about the state of their own marriage?
Happy partying…Luv, Zen Lill
December 14th, 2010 at 2:17 am
I agree with you on so many points. One of my “friends” asked me where I was getting sex now that my divorce was final. I said “Pat, please don’t ask me that.” She said, “okay if that’s how you feel.
Later when the party really got going and when the rest of the girls arrived for the baby shower, as we were about to have a glass of wine to toast the new little one, she asked me again.
She said “Josie, now that your divorce is final, who’s filling that pretty hole?” I was so mad that I looked her straight in the eye and said, “the same guy who was before the divorce, Donald.”
You could hear the proverbial pin drop, it was so quiet, everyone stared at Pat. I could see a tear form in the corner of her eye.
Still, I waited a bit longer before i said, “no, not your husband, Donald, another guy I know whose name is Donald also.” Now that nosey bitch won’t fuck with me again.
Josie
December 14th, 2010 at 2:44 am
Michelle your article about Boehner just points out another hypocritical moment in the political philosophy of the Right.
They claim that they want strong leaders. If Obama were to show that kind of moment, he would be labeled a weak leader.
It is all about lies, and using whatever stereotype to demean the competition. My husband misses no opportunity to put down Obama.
He is a democrat that blames Obama for the tax breaks the rich are getting courtesy of the republican party.
I can’t say it to the dear, because men being babies, he would take criticism from me too badly. But I can say it here.
Why do white men jump on every opportunity to put Obama down? I wanted to say to my husband the man works so hard with so little.
He has a republican party that wants to give the country to the rich and corporations and a democratic party that is so divided as to be three parties in one and a country full of white people who would rather give leadership back to a bunch of ignorant, greedy, white people than to allow a black man to look better than any of the previous white men who ran the country into the ground.
Now, you know a good white wife can’t say that to her tiny dick husband. But I can say it here and I did.
I can’t tell you the relief this has given me. Thank you again for your blog Michelle.
Helena
December 14th, 2010 at 2:55 am
Two friends agreed to meet for drinks after work. One arrived late and said, ” Sorry, but on my way here I saw three punks slapping my old boss around.”
His friend asked, “Did you stop to help?”
The guy said, “NO. I figured the three of them could handle it,”
December 14th, 2010 at 4:30 am
Hafa adai
You need to know that there are counterfeit bills circulating on Guam.
The Customs & Quarantine Agency urges the general public to be aware of counterfeit currency that may be circulating the island.
There are certain ways to identify authentic bills without the use of special pens or lights that may not be available to the average citizen.
First, take a good look at the bill. You may be able to differentiate a real bill from a photocopy.
Another technique of authenticating a bill is to hold it up to a light source and locate its watermark, which is usually on its right side and its security thread on its left.
If you look close enough, you may also be able to read any microprinting which identifies the bill’s value or the phrase “The United States of America.” Still another way to identify authentic bills is to look for “color shifting” ink.
If you do come across or have seen what you suspect is a counterfeit bill, you are urged to contact the Guam Police Department or the United States Secret Service immediately.
Peter
December 14th, 2010 at 6:10 am
Zen Lill
When I got divorced my friends asked why I was still friends with my husband. I told them because he was the father of my children and I wanted them to feel free to be honest about the love they had for their dad.
One of my friends said, “then I hope you won’t mind me allowing him to visit his son by me.” I slapped the bitch so hard it hurt my hand.
December 14th, 2010 at 6:13 am
I don’t know about you Philby, but I’m going to start peeing into some shit if I don’t get more respect from the people I wait on in the fast food place where I work.
December 14th, 2010 at 6:16 am
Elliot
you are like most men who envy Anonz. Gutless wonders who lie to achieve whatever success you have with women.
December 14th, 2010 at 6:27 am
Michelle
What do you think of women who go mush over men who show them their gun collection? My brother Mark has an ever growing gun collection.
He is forever showing them or bragging about how many he has to females. When I reproach him for it, he reminds me of all the fine women he beds(he is not lying) and that he gets them because of his gun collection.
My brother is a spineless coward. He once left our mother and me to defend ourselves from two niggers who wouldn’t let us use their filthy yard as a short cut to our car with two bags full of groceries.
When they approached to prevent us from crossing, he ran back into the store. Later he said he thought we could handle a couple of skinny niggers without his help.
This from a man who has hand guns, rifles, submachine guns, shotguns, and fully automatic military weapons.
Gloria
December 14th, 2010 at 6:35 am
Anonz is a breed above. A man who puts his beliefs on the line with his life. He helps those who cannot help themselves.
Say what you will about his politics, but this girl would rather him as a life’s companion than all the “let me tell you how to make a better world” pundits out there.
There are so many men who espouse what they think women want to hear to impress them. While this man is out there defending them with his life.
What do they do? They put him down in every way they can or they complain about the women who see the Hero in him.
God bless you Anonz
Laquita