Earth Day: I’m green with inspiration
Posted by Michelle Moquin on April 22nd, 2011
Good morning!
Earth Day is today. Has it already been a year since I blogged about it? I almost decided to copy and paste my write last year because as we all know, any suggestions of ways to help save our planet (and really, if you think about it, they are really suggestions to save us - the planet will be here long after we disappear) are certainly relevant today too.
But then I began to peruse the net and found something new that I wanted to post. What is a great way to spread the word about anything? What can adults and their children do together that is not only entertaining but illuminating as well?
Answer: Go the the movies. Specifically a “green” movie: films, documentaries and television series that are “eco-minded”. Yes, a movie can have a huge impact on how we think and act if done in an inspiring way.
Earth Day 2011: The Best Green Movies And Shows To Watch (VIDEO)
Earth Day Network has compiled a list of recommended eco-minded films, documentaries and television series that will fit nicely with any other Earth Day plans.
Social media has the ability to educate and inspire. The listed projects range from Oscar nominees to little-known gems. Kathleen Rogers, President of Earth Day Network, says, “We hope these excellent projects inspire discussions at the dinner table, in the classrooms and in City Hall and prove to be catalysts for both thought and action.”
Check out one of these films today (and watch the others later)!
This one is called Mia and Migoo, and won the the European Film Award for the Best Animated Feature. Here’s the clip:
Featuring the voices of John DiMaggio, Whoopi Goldberg, Matthew Modine, Wallace Shawn, and James Woods. This stunning new animated adventure pits plucky, wild-haired young Mia against profit hungry developers with the future of life on Earth in the balance. One night, Mia has a premonition and sets out on a journey through mountains and jungles to find her father who has been trapped in a disaster-plagued construction site on a remote tropical lake. In the middle of the lake stands the ancient Tree of Life, watched over by bumbling forest spirits called Migoo. It is the Migoo who have been disrupting construction to protect this sacred site – and together with Mia they join in a fight to save the Tree and find Mia’s father. Created from an astonishing 500,000 hand-painted frames of animation, the film is a work of art, breathtaking to behold.
*To be released in theaters nationally on 4/22
**ALL theatrical proceeds from opening weekend support Earth Day Network’s Canopy Project, which is part of the Billion Acts of Green Campaign.
Happy Earth Day Everyone! Go out and kiss the ground you walk on!
Peace out.
Lastly, greed over a great story is surfacing from my “loyal”(?) readers. With all this back and forth about who owns what, that appears on my blog, let me reiterate that all material posted on my blog becomes the sole property of my blog. If you want to reserve any proprietary rights don’t post it to my blog. I will prominently display this caveat on my blog from now on to remind those who may have forgotten this notice.
Gratefully your blog host,
michelle
Aka BABE: We all know what this means by now :)
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April 22nd, 2011 at 1:19 pm
What to Say to a Jerk
Mark Goulston, MD
Communication is challenging enough with the “normal” people in your life — the ones who want to cooperate and make life better for everyone. When you are forced to deal with jerks — people who don’t care about social give-and-take — communication can seem next to impossible, leaving you drained and upset.
Jerks tend to trigger powerful negative emotional reactions that take a long time to recover from and that interfere with clear thinking.
As a psychiatrist, I refer to jerks as “toxic people.”
If being around a toxic person is having a destructive effect on your physical or emotional health, you may need to get that person out of your life completely.
But in many cases, you can “neutralize” the negative effect that a toxic person has on you. Here, simple ways to do it…
Recognize when a person is toxic. Everyone can be uncooperative and selfish some of the time — and the techniques in this article can work during those times.
But a toxic person is different from a person who is just having a bad day.
Toxic people have a distinctive view of life. They perceive the world as having cheated them out of something or as owing them something. Nothing good that happens to them changes that perception for long.
In contrast to healthy people, who feel entitled to what they deserve… and neurotics, who do not feel entitled to what they deserve… toxic people feel entitled to what they don’t deserve.
They do not play by the usual rules of getting along with others. They feel justified in taking, with no compulsion to give.
This belief system reveals itself in different ways for different types of toxic people.
A toxic bully may aggressively push others around to get his/her way, whereas a toxically needy person may feel entitled to have his hand held constantly or insist that other people fight his battles. Bullies scream and demand. Toxically needy people whine and complain.
Adjust your expectations. We expect people to behave reasonably, and the shock that we feel when toxic people do not do so can be quite painful.
Toxic people sometimes may appear to be caring and cooperative. This behavior will last only until they get what they want. Don’t be fooled into thinking that they have changed.
In addition, the strategies that usually work with nontoxic people — such as empathizing or appealing to fairness — do not work with toxic people.
Once you have identified a person as toxic, your smartest move is to protect yourself from being blindsided. Expect the person to act solely in his own interests even when he appears to be kind and caring.
Hold part of yourself back. Toxic people get what they want by pushing others off balance. They do so by acting in ways that trigger rage, fear, guilt and other strong emotions in others. Remind yourself not to get emotionally engaged. This is their issue, not yours.
Helpful: Pause before responding. No matter what the toxic person says or does, make a practice of waiting several seconds or more before you reply. Stay calm.
The longer you wait before responding, the more the toxic person may escalate his behavior. For example, he may get even angrier or whine even more. But the behavior is less likely to upset you, because you are keeping your emotional distance.
WHAT TO SAY TO A JERK
Three good responses to nearly every type of toxic person…
“Huh?” This one word can stop a jerk in his tracks. Use a mild, neutral tone of voice. Do this when the toxic person says something utterly ridiculous but acts as if he is being perfectly reasonable.
This response conveys that what the toxic person is saying doesn’t make sense. It works because it signals that you are not engaging with the content of what he said.
“Do you really believe what you just said?” Use a calm, straightforward tone, not a confrontational one. This question works because toxic people often resort to hyperbole to throw others off balance.
They are prone to using the words “always” and “never” to drive home their points. However, don’t expect the toxic person to admit that he is wrong.
He is more likely to walk away in a huff — which is fine because then you won’t have to waste more energy dealing with him.
“I can see how this is good for you. Tell me how it’s good for me.” This response is a useful way to deal with a toxic person’s demands.
If he stalls or changes the subject, you can say, “Since it’s not clear how this is good for me, I’m going to have to say no.”
Here are other responses to specific types of toxic people…
BYE TO BULLIES
A bully gets what he wants by scaring other people. Even when he is behaving himself, his presence triggers fear because you never know when he will explode.
What to do…
Disengage: Most bullies use words and tone of voice as their weapons. Say silently to yourself, This person is not going to physically harm me.
Picture his words as rubber bullets that, instead of hitting you between the eyes, zoom over your shoulder. Caution: If there is any possibility that the person may be physically violent, leave at once.
Respond: Take a deep breath, and say out loud, “Ah, geez, this is going to be a long conversation” or “You gotta be kidding” (said mockingly to show that the bully hasn’t scared or offended you).
Whatever the bully’s reaction — whether he demands an explanation or continues to attack — you can calmly say, “You’re upset, I’m starting to shut down, and before we get to anything constructive, the sun is going to set, and then we’re going to have to start all over again tomorrow because I don’t see us reaching any conclusion.”
If he keeps pushing and says, “I am not upset — you’re just not listening,” you say, “Nah, forget it, it’s gone, gone… the opportunity even to get into a conversation is gone, finito, flew the coop.” The bully eventually will give up.
You can repeat this approach the next time. If the bully says, “Don’t try that with me again,” you just say, “Sorry, I find this exhausting, and I need to preserve my energy.
If you can figure out a way to talk with me instead of at me, I’m willing. Until then, count me out.” Then walk away — which will be easy once you let go of the expectation that you will ever reach a win-win solution with this person.
NEUTRALIZE NEEDY PEOPLE
Unlike people who have a healthy need for others, toxically needy people expect constant help and attention and often use guilt to get it.
No matter how much you do for them, it is never enough. They act like victims, suck you dry and leave you feeling depressed and incompetent because nothing ever gets better for them.
What to do…
Disengage: Imagine that the needy person has a hook that he is trying to snag you with, but the hook has missed you.
Respond: A needy person might say in a nails-on-a-chalkboard voice, “It’s not fair.” Pause and calmly but firmly say, “It is completely fair to everyone that it affects.”
GIVE IT TO TAKERS
The taker constantly asks you for favors but never seems to have the time or energy to pitch in when you need help.
Whereas needy people make you feel as if they are sucking you dry, takers make you feel as if they are grabbing at you.
What to do…
Disengage: Picture the taker as a child grabbing at you to get your attention. Imagine yourself calmly tapping him on the wrist and saying, “Now, now, wait your turn.”
Respond: Make a mental list of ways the taker could help you. The next time he asks for a favor say, “Sure! And you can help me out by… ” If he balks, say, “I assume you don’t mind doing a favor for me in return, right?”
Insist on a quid pro quo each time, and the taker will soon move on to an easier target.
8 SIGNS OF A JERK
A toxic person…
1. Interrupts.
2. Doesn’t take turns.
3. Takes advantage of people who are down.
4. Gloats in victory.
5. Is sullen in defeat.
6. Is not fair.
7. Lacks integrity.
8. Is the kind of person you’ll avoid if you possibly can.
Personal interviewed Mark Goulston, MD, psychiatrist, business consultant, executive coach, and FBI and police hostage negotiation trainer, Santa Monica, California. A best-selling author,
he writes a column on leadership for Fast Company and contributes to Harvard Business Review. His books include Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone (Amacom). http://www.MarkGoulston.com
April 22nd, 2011 at 4:08 pm
It’s better to allow our lives to speak for us than just our words. And on Good Friday we get to take stock of whether we are achieving this. – Unknown
April 22nd, 2011 at 6:05 pm
This is so amazing. I knew my husband was TOXIC. General Info you described the jerk to a tee.
Now to get rid of his ass.
April 23rd, 2011 at 12:22 am
We are in 1869:
WILD BILL’S ALLEGED MARKSMANSHIP
While most western badmen are hopelessly poor shots, and rely on catching their victims at close quarters from behind, Wild Bill Hickok has been known to hit the human target he intended from a distance of 75 yards.
But his other alleged feats of marksmanship with his pistol are clearly suspect.
Shooting the pip out of the ace of spades at 50 yards distances is quite beyond the capability of the clumsy long-barrelled pistols used by westerners.
Spinning a silver dollar in the air and putting a bullet through it, is beyond the Newtonian capability of the two pieces of metal, which would simply dent each other if our hero eve succeeded in making them coincide.
April 23rd, 2011 at 1:42 am
Michelle, this may sound selfish but I too love the idea that we who have been you loyal fans for years get to hold on to knowledge that came to us because of that loyalty.
Dawn
April 23rd, 2011 at 4:25 am
Michelle;
I decided to post so that you would know that women aren’t the only ones who have been fans for more that 2 years. It’s been a great ride. I hope you continue.
Vaughn
April 23rd, 2011 at 4:30 am
Two hillbillies were out fishing one afternoon. The first said to the second,
“Supposin’ I as to sneak over to your place Saturday and make love to your wife while you was off huntin’ and she got pregnant and had a baby. Would that make us kin?”
The second replied, “I don’t know about that, but it sure would make us even.”
April 23rd, 2011 at 5:31 am
If only we would remember the earth the other 364 days of the year.
September 3rd, 2011 at 4:31 am
personalspecialties…
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