Is Cheating A Rational Choice?
Posted by Michelle Moquin on May 23rd, 2012
Good morning!
I have always been interested in the simplicities and complexities of relationships…the “hows”, the “whys”, the “why nots”, etc., Now that my romantic relationship has ended, I find myself perusing articles on relationships a bit more than I used to…with a different set of eyes…eyes of a single girl.
Is Cheating a Rational Choice?
Despite the loosening of sexual restrictions in recent decades, open relationships and cheating remain highly stigmatized. However, focusing on the problem of cheating distracts us from focusing on the problem of monogamy. Long term sex with just one partner leads to less sexual desire for that partner, regardless of the strength of the emotional relationship.
Those entering into their first serious romantic/sexual relationship are misled into thinking that monogamy is capable of providing a lifetime of sexual fulfillment. They believe that if they truly love their partners, they would not desire sex with others. This, we are told, is because monogamy is healthy, proper, moral and natural. Conversely, anyone challenging this is socially stigmatized. But with 13 million people in 22 countries looking to have a marital affair on Ashley Madison.com alone, it suggests that, for many, monogamy is more of a desire, than practice. This is true of both men and women.
My sociological research, combined with the work of psychologists, biologist, anthropologists, and even endocrinologists, suggests that monogamy is an uneasy fit for human beings. It’s a fashionable social expectation, but not a biological desire. This means that there is a gap between what we want sexually and morally. The gap is less noticeable when entering into a relationship. But despite the frequent and intense sex of the honeymoon phase, sexual habituation quickly sets in.
Interestingly, the relentless urge to have sex with someone other than one’s lover grows stronger as the emotional strength of the relationship develops. When every cell in their body is craving sex with someone else, monogamy begins to feel like sexual incarceration. But this growing sexual desire does not indicate that one has failed to love their partner. In fact, choosing to stay with one’s partner, despite wanting sex with others, suggests that they do love their partners. They simply want sex with someone else to fulfill their sexual desires while keeping their emotional relationship intact. If they failed to love their partners, they would be more likely to leave them, particularly if they do not have kids or a mortgage together.
It is at this point that couples ought to have the social freedom to discuss the various forms of open sexual relationships. But because these more honest forms of loving are culturally condemned, we must either choose to live with the agony of longing for sex with someone else, or cheat — something which the Internet has made far easier. Conversely, asking for an open relationship is more likely to result in break-up, or at least increased surveillance, so cheating becomes a more viable option for most.
Cheating therefore exits as the only rational choice to have one’s emotional and sexual desires met in a culture that stigmatizes open relationships/marriages. Cheating serves as a way to meet sexual desires, with as little disruption to their emotional lives as possible. I don’t condone cheating, but I condemn the expectation of monogamy for setting up this conundrum in the first place.
In response to my research (which focuses on men), some choose a moralist stance, arguing that men should not act on their desires, no matter how strong. When confronted with the incontrovertible evidence that sexual frequency and quality dies as a relationship grows, others choose (in heterosexual relationships) a woman-blaming, victim-blaming strategy. Research consistently shows that men want more sex than women, and this places the onus of responsibility on women to meet men’s sexual needs. Women are told, often by other women, that they need to put more effort into meeting their husband’s desires to prevent them from straying.
Others seem to want to doom those unhappy with monogamy to a life of loneliness, suggesting that if they desire sex with others, they should never enter into relationships in the first place. Still others wish for the family unit to dissolve, simply because one has cheated. In all of these cases, the cultural condition of monogamy fails to serve the family well. All of this “morality” tears families apart.
Few, however, highlight the obvious answer to the dilemma of monogamy and cheating — sexually open relationships. Here, in an egalitarian manner, a couple reserves emotional fidelity, while structuring in rules for extra-dyadic, recreational sex.
Thus, the way out of the monogamy gap is for us to begin equally valuing sexually open relationships, alongside monogamous ones. When there is no stigma to having an open sexual relationship, men and women (of all sexual orientations) will begin to be more honest about what they want sexually, and how they desire to achieve it. Only once sexually open relationships become a viable cultural choice — free of stigma or hierarchy — will we be able to talk honestly about what form of relationship would serve us best.
*******
Readers: Hmm…Love to hear your thoughts. Blog me.
Mikey’s Back: Ah…I get it. You’ve got his back. Nice.
Paul: It wasn’t lost on me. Thanks for pointing it out.
Shirley: Thanks too for illuminating that stat.
Helen: And our growing private prison system backs your statements.
Mike: I look forward to seeing what you will choose. I HOPE you are well and things are going as planned.
It’s Wednesday and I already feel like it is the weekend. For me, that s a good thing. Have a good one everyone!
Lastly, greed over a great story is surfacing from my “loyal”(?) readers. With all this back and forth about who owns what, that appears on my blog, let me reiterate that all material posted on my blog becomes the sole property of my blog. If you want to reserve any proprietary rights don’t post it to my blog. I will prominently display this caveat on my blog from now on to remind those who may have forgotten this notice.
Gratefully your blog host,
michelle
Aka BABE: We all know what this means by now :)
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May 23rd, 2012 at 10:41 am
“Cheating therefore exits as the only rational choice to have one’s emotional and sexual desires met in a culture that stigmatizes open relationships/marriages.”
BS: Cheating exists when you run around behind your partner. Don’t blame society for your behavior – if everyone accepted society’s rule, seems like there would be a lot more misogynist racists running around. I say ball up and say what you need, what you want and what you are willing to accept. Find the relationship that satisfies your needs in an open, honest way.
Polyamory can be a sticky wicket. To allow your partner to be intimate with another, without you, can be a test for those ugly jealousy emotions. It’s a definite test to the strength of the relationship. How do you know your partner won’t just move on? It’s not for everyone. It does take a commitment to honesty and always remembering and giving deference to relationship number 1. It’s difficult for a lot of HBs to express themselves emotionally or to express themselves sexually even if they have only one partner, so to be able to express attraction for another is a difficult conversation for most HBs to have. But it can be done. And it is a conversation you have to have because otherwise, it’s dishonest and cheating.
I’ve been in a poly relationship for more than 25 years. I still want sex with No. 1 over any other lovers, contrary to the article above. Like ZL, I do prefer to focus on one relationship at a time, more often than not. Two HBs partners of the same sex can get kind of complicated but one male and one female lover is just fine – and for me, preferable at the same time.
PrP
May 23rd, 2012 at 10:43 am
I take other lovers and amusements on the side
I might welcome new ones should you wish to abide.
I give you My body and often My Heart but I don’t believe you’d tear Us apart.
There’s always the chance that I could be wrong,if you’re game for Love, then please come along.
Its most amusing to tussle and tryst,
there’s nothing I love more than being enticed.
With the ABs in confusion and my sex life on ration
the longing in Me is stirring up quite the Passion!
PrP
May 23rd, 2012 at 12:30 pm
PrP, you are the woman of my dreams. What can I do to get next to you?
Ira
May 23rd, 2012 at 12:31 pm
A busy Wednesday means it’s short and sweet from me. Take a look at the great columns we have for you on the site today, including David’s column lambasting the Democratic Party for it’s controversial backing of the HHS unconstitutional mandate of contraceptives and other life-killing drugs, in light of the lawsuit from many Catholic dioceses arguing against the mandate. A must read.
Also – Gizzi recaps the races in Kentucky and Arkansas last night, which pitted some heavy hitters in the conservative movement against one another. Plus, Michelle Malkin’s column is about the now-resigned chair of the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. She is quite thrilled at his resignation. That and much more, only at HumanEvents.com
-Adam
May 23rd, 2012 at 2:13 pm
I don’t know Ira, tell me what can you.
Sweet words I’m the woman of your dreams but where would you stand in mine?
PrP
May 23rd, 2012 at 2:29 pm
Hafa adai: Truer words have not been spoken.
==============
Guam – Guam Governor Eddie Calvo told reporters in Okinawa today that Guam can not handle the proposed military buildup unless its infrastructure is upgraded first.
The Governor was respondng to questions from Japanese reporters who asked whether the lack of funding would cause a delay in the movement of U.S. troops from Okinawa to Guam.
According to a release from Adelup, the Governor said “the massive migration to Guam over the past 25 years from the U.S. treaty with the freely associated states, the infrastructure is already maxed out,
so how could the island accept another migration without increasing the infrastructure capacity first. It is a very practical consideration that Congress must understand.”
The Governor said it’s important for leaders in Washington and Tokyo to recognize the need to build infrastructure saying “the sooner Congress realizes the absolute need to fund these things,
the sooner the buildup can happen and the sooner the troops can move from Okinawa to Guam.”
====================
Are you listening Washington?
Peter
May 23rd, 2012 at 11:26 pm
http://www.estherperel.com/ this woman has done some of the controversial yet comprehensive and most contemporary work on the subject, she has several youtube videos if reading isn’t your thing.
The conundrum regarding your comment, PrP, is that most HB’s of both sexes are not all that capable of being open and honest about exactly what they want, maybe bc most are not exactly sure what they want and sometimes they want it monogamous in the beginning and then not so much after the honeymoon stage, and they get insecure about both people being out and about seeking sex with others. (as in: I know I can handle it but she may fall in love and therefore I don’t want her to have sex outside of the relationship or he just feels man entitlement so he can but she cannot, hmmm, questionable logic there).
It seems to me once comfort and security set in so does the ‘oh you again’ factor, its also easier (much) to keep it hot when you don’t live together or marry and you’re not hellbent on knowing every move your partner makes. It’s a nice balance of security with another and independence and autonomy of self.
Marriage can last a long time, and it sounds romantic to stay so in love that he/she is all you ever want, sexually and otherwise… though I think turning your head for your yourself and your partner and doing what you need to Perel style isn’t a bad option. I really wouldn’t want to be quizzed or do the quizzing about who/how/when/where/what position – why would I want to know and unless you/she are spreading diseases sans protection, why should I spend my time thinking about what you might do or are doing and with who (and vice versa)? Ick, that’s way too much to think about, I’m busy handling other life stuff…
Maybe I’m just not that jealous and possessive…or it could be bc I have had male friends tell me that they love their wives/GF’s and could still take up, sexually only, with another (here’s where the bullshit can get deep, lying to two parties now and that I don’t do all that well, note to self: practice my poker face if I choose to step out and lie if caught out). I don’t know a lot of females that feel that way, though I could be wrong.
I’ll say that the higher testosterone levels in males does possibly play a part in that. So, eh, lie, don’t lie, sex up another, don’t sex up another, it really often does not change the love and attachment and pair bonding factors unless one party decides to get seriously offended or falls in love with the side salad and I’m not commenting on how right/wrong that is, to each her/his own…
There’s my two or ten…! Luv, Zen Lill
PS I love this topic, the conscious & unconscious pysches and actions (and sex lives) of HB’s is fascinating subject matter.
May 24th, 2012 at 6:49 am
My man thinks I don’t know that he is playing around. His macho korean me-the-man bullshit isn’t working.
I have decided to do what I want when I am away from him. This is very good information. To bad most of my friends don’t read english and are too busy to translate.
Thanks Michelle.
May 24th, 2012 at 6:55 am
Zen Lill, I agree with you. I have a great relationship with a man who I can’t be with regularly because I am married. But our relationship is much stronger than the one with my cheating husband.
I caught him 3 years ago and his solution was to suggest that we have an open marriage. I was against it until I met Hank.
He doesn’t know that I am married. My husband agreed 2 years ago to pretend to be a relative if I let him sneak and watch Hank and me make out.
It’s been good. I have since had one or two other quickies that I shared with my husband and a few that were just one of those moment things.
Hank is my true desire. He has asked me to marry him. But like you said I don’t think I could handle a one on one only thing like the type of marriage Hank is interested in.
Wilma
May 24th, 2012 at 7:15 am
PrP, I would like to dialogue with you. I am 31 just off a 7 year relationship with a woman who had not one romantic bone in her body, at least not for me.
When I caught her with my sister, I asked her WHY? She just smiled and said that she was never interested in men only their money.
I gave my sister $3 million of my money and wished them well. 3 years ago she turned me on to this blog. Frankly it saved my sanity. I loved Gloria so much that I thought I was just inadequate and she was an angel for putting up with me.
But this blog opened me up to the possibilities of a social existence I had been previously afraid to tackle. I have since been in a few light relationships that have been fun.
I like poetry, R&B(the old ones) Frank Sinatra, Englebert Humperdinck, the Ballet(but not the Opera), Action Movies(seriously into all things alien) I do miss Howie’s column.
I am one of the successful .com yuppies that didn’t waste his money. I presently dabble in the stock market using software I designed to help me pick stocks.
I live in Chicago, but have nothing holding me here since my best friend and twin sister, ran off with my fiancee, six years ago.
We are still family. I love her, but I don’t trust her around my female friends. So that puts us at a strained distance.
I hope you are amenable to blog discourse with me.
Dylan
May 24th, 2012 at 7:25 am
Home Remedies and Natural Cures for Dogs and Cats
Visits to the veterinarian can cost pet owners a pretty penny, but there are situations when pet owners can safely avoid vet bills by treating their pets themselves or by taking action to prevent dog or cat health problems.
Among them…
MOTION SICKNESS
Over-the-counter (OTC) allergy medication diphenhydramine (Benadryl) is a safe and effective motion sickness treatment for dogs and cats that become nauseated on trips, just as it is for humans.
As an added benefit, Benadryl causes drowsiness, calming pets made anxious by travel.
The challenge is getting the dosage right—most pets are significantly smaller than people, and they require lower doses.
One milligram of Benadryl per pound of body weight is a reasonable rule of thumb, but start with a much smaller dose—perhaps one-quarter of a milligram per pound—when you give a pet Benadryl for the first time.
Though this medication makes most pets and people drowsy, it causes the opposite reaction in a small percentage of users. Discontinue use if the animal becomes hyperactive.
Helpful: To get dogs and cats to take medications, you can put soft cheese, bread or peanut butter around a pill or add liquid medicine to canned pet food or other food that your pet enjoys.
EAR INFECTIONS
Signs of ear infections in pets include redness and swelling around the ear, loss of balance, red or yellow discharge from the ear or persistent ear scratching and head shaking.
Once a pet develops an ear infection, a trip to the vet is required.
But pet owners can help prevent ear infections by cleaning pets’ ears when needed. Look for accumulations of black-looking material or other matter.
Lie the dog or cat on its side. Ask a family member to help hold the pet down if it is large or feisty. Fill its ear with mineral oil, massage the area, then fill the ear with warm water to rinse out the oil.
Ideally this process should be repeated three times with each ear, letting the pet shake its head to clear out the liquid after each filling of mineral oil or warm water.
Do this ear cleaning in the bathroom or outside. Otherwise the mineral oil and earwax could stain furniture or carpets.
“PRICKERS” IN THE SKIN
A widespread weed, known as foxtail or grass awns, has aggressive seeds (awns) that stick to pets’ fur and burrow into skin, causing infections or abscesses.
In some cases, grass awns work their way into an animal’s chest or abdominal cavity, causing serious lifelong health problems or even death.
Both dogs and cats can be affected, though problems are less common with cats, which often can remove grass awns while grooming.
The best solution is prevention—regularly mow lawns where pets spend time and keep pets out of tall, weedy grass.
When a pet does get into tall grass, examine the animal very carefully and remove any seedpods and stickers. A trip to the veterinarian is required once a grass awn gets into the pet’s skin.
CANINE KENNEL COUGH
If a dog exhibits a dry and hacking cough that becomes worse when temperatures drop in the evening, the cause probably is kennel cough, which typically lasts two to three weeks.
Kennel cough is spread like the common cold, so any contact with an infected dog potentially can transmit the disease.
There’s little point to bringing a dog with kennel cough to the vet right away—as with the common cold, there is no cure.
To help relieve the cough so that you and the dog can get some sleep, try Robitussin DM, the same OTC medicine that you might use yourself.
This won’t cure the underlying problem, but it can at least calm the cough for a while so that the pet—and everyone else in the house—can relax and sleep through the night.
One teaspoon is a reasonable dose for a large dog…one-half teaspoon for a small dog. If the cough persists, it’s probably worth a trip to the vet.
CAT HAIR BALL INTESTINAL BLOCKAGES
Cats use their tongues to groom their fur, and some fur inevitably is ingested. While most ingested fur simply passes through the cat, some of it can remain in the stomach, becoming a hair ball.
If you have reason to believe that your cat has developed an intestinal blockage—an empty litter box suggesting constipation, for example, or repeated retching without producing a hair ball—put undiluted Carnation concentrated canned milk in its dish and let it drink.
Soon after, the cat will have loose stools, cleaning out the intestines. If symptoms persist, see a veterinarian.
DOGS WITH RED, INFLAMED LIPS AND NOSE
Plastic food and water bowls often are to blame when dogs develop these symptoms—some dogs are allergic to chemicals found in plastics.
If so, switching to a stainless steel or ceramic bowl should solve the problem.
See a vet if the dog has not been eating from plastic bowls or if you make the switch and don’t see any improvement within two weeks or so. Plastic bowls don’t seem to cause these problems for cats.
Source: Robert L. Ridgway, DVM, a veterinarian with the Orange County Animal Services in Orlando, Florida. He previously served in the US Army Veterinary Corps, where he headed the Department of Defense Military Dog Veterinary Service at Lackland Air Force Base.
He is author of How to Treat Your Dogs and Cats with Over-the-Counter Drugs (iUniverse).
May 24th, 2012 at 7:31 am
Zen Lill, My boyfriend and I had an “open” relationship for 4 years. Now he wants to get married.
What do you think? He says that he has had his fill of other women and he knows that I am the one and now he wants to settle down in a monogamous relationship.
I told him we should try it as a couple for a few years first and then get married if it is what we really want. But he insists that we have done all that and he wants to settle down and start a family.
What would you do?
Donna
May 24th, 2012 at 7:36 am
My brother has been cheating on his wife for 9 of the 11 years of his marriage. Actually he may never have started earlier. I only discovered it when I found a used rubber in my bed. He had been using my apartment for his liaisons.
Should I tell his wife? I know it is a little late? But I have only been reading his blog for a few months.
Suzanne
May 24th, 2012 at 7:39 am
Sorry I wanted to add that Michelle says girls should tell but I wonder if she will be mad that I waited so long to tell her. We are good friends.
Our children play together and we share trips, holidays and frequent flier miles.
Suzanne
May 24th, 2012 at 7:43 am
Zen Lill, my husband likes to hang out with my brother who cheats on his wife. We have caught him many times. Ron says that we should just stay out of it.
Now, I am worried that Ron maybe getting messages from Steve that it is okay to cheat.
Should I discourage Ron from hanging out with my brother?
Tammy
May 24th, 2012 at 7:47 am
Wilma, there are all kinds of relationships to have in this world, the way you mix it up is personal choice. Frankly, I’ve got a life to live and I’ve little time or inclination to monitor a grown mans behavior when Im not around, nor do I expect to be monitored by any man.
Anytime I get questioned regarding my whereabouts and I don’t want to answer because it feels invasive rather than just inquisitive (and there’s a difference you can feel), I say isn’t it interesting how girls/women grow up trained to not ask men too many q’s lest they get pissy about their independence and yet you’re totally cool with asking me where I was on the day I wasn’t available to take your call/be with you, soooo interesting, isn’t it??
Seems to me most males want what they want when they want it and if women pulled that all the time, we’d be labeled demanding (or slutty, which is a label I am totally OK with, that’s as much of a knock as calling a man a stud to me).
Wilma, your story is a perfect illustration of living out an open marriage bc in the end you stay together bc you choose to, and your hubby knows that another man is likely to try to entice you into leaving him to go live with/marry them. On the flip, men usually do not split to go off into the sunset with their side salad, occasionally they do but that wasn’t the intention when they started the boff sessions with another, to a man usually it is as simple as bumping parts with a new body.
Speaking of new bodies…I saw the ‘Avengers’ the other night, or as I call it ‘Beefcake on parade’ – I’ll leave my comment at that ; )
Kai, do be careful, culturally speaking your man may not be very tolerant should he find out your having your way with another when out of the postal code. There are Western men like that also, call it a double standard, though men who like the double standard will often dump a woman if she ‘cheats’ even if he’s out and about regularly. I just wish for you to watch your own back, thank you.
Luv, Zen Lill
May 24th, 2012 at 8:05 am
All my brothers(4) cheat on their wives. It is a joke they talk about when we get together for the holidays. None of them bring their wives, sometimes they show up with their latest slut.
Mom, just looks the other way. She is so disappointed in the fact that the boys live so far away and that their wives “hate” her that she doesn’t seem to care who they bring to Xmas, Thanksgiving dinners or our parents’ birthday celebrations.
I am so embarrassed when George, my husband, makes a comment about if he should trust me since it seems that my family has questionable morals.
Actually, I have had long talks about this with all my brothers. They scoff and suggest that I leave George at home when I come to family socials.
They seem so callus to my suggestions that this could give George ideas to check on me. Unlike them I don’t flaunt my indiscretions. 21 years of marriage and I have never been caught.
We got married at 17 and 29. I love him but he is just too small to satisfy my sweet spot. And now that he has turned 50, he doesn’t spend as much time satisfying me with his tongue.
I am in my prime so I don’t want to have to stop what I have been doing since I discovered what a real orgasm was.
Damn my brothers they are just so irresponsible. i talked to Dad and he said that my husband was just lucky he didn’t kill him when he ran off and married me in the first place. Why can’t men think outside their own angst’s?
One would think he would have been happy that my husband had insisted that I finish high school and encouraged and supported me throughout my internship and residency.
He left his teaching positions twice to accompany me from my 2 year internship and again for my residency.
No woman could have had a more loving and caring partner. But as you so professionally explained Zen Lill, when it comes to sexual gratification those are not enough to sustain a relationship.
In my case cheating definitely saved and continues to save our marriage.
Maggie
May 24th, 2012 at 8:10 am
You people are sick! Disgusting infidelity as if it was the flavor of the day. Michelle you are headed straight for Hell. I have been reading your blog for more than three years.
It is full of sinful encouragements. No wonder that sweet man Doug left you. He was probably too embarrassed to be known as your partner.
Marilyn
May 24th, 2012 at 8:13 am
Dylan
I’m always open to dialogue, here, on my blog or you can email me: prismprincess@orderlyrandomness.com.
PrP
May 24th, 2012 at 8:13 am
I agree with this article up to a point. I can see how a bit of strange every now and then for a man can save a marriage, but not for a woman.
Women fall in love to easily. They need to hold on to the relationship they are married to. If you discover your man is into a little strange, be mature. He is not leaving you, he is just doing what he knows will enable him to appreciate you more.
Eric
May 24th, 2012 at 8:29 am
Wilma, I think you sound pathetic. At first, I was like, great for you, your husband knows, both parties are on board, consenting adults and all. Whatever works for your marriage great. But then you wrote your relationship with your piece is stronger than with your husband. And add your piece doesn’t even know your married. Oh yeah, that sounds like a rock solid relationship. WTF? You are totally playing Hank. How is that a strong relationship? You make a great example of cheating being totally selfish behavior with no consideration for your partner, whichever side of the marriage the piece is on. You and all the other cheaters exemplify the “its all about me” attitude, as long as I get mine, fuck everybody else. There is such a lack of integrity in our society. You cheaters all make me sick.
May 24th, 2012 at 8:31 am
Dylan, you still haven’t learned much. Why are you using your real name? It is a blog for god’s sake.
31 going on 16. You don’t write or call me. Yet you get on this blog and say we are still family. Sending money even if it is 7 figures doesn’t make us family.
Hanging out, being together makes us family. We had shared everything for all our lives until you got possessive over TJ.
So what now, you think you have found your soul mate with this woman? I am you soulmate. TJ is just as ZL says “side salad.”
Did you not expect me to fuck her, you were. Why not me? We shared everything else. If this is the way you are going to act. I will return all your damn bank deposits.
I don’t want your money. If you are going to treat your first and only true love like this screw you. You are sick!
You know I read this blog and you brag about wanting to send poetry to some other woman. You are sick!
Did I blame you for getting mom and dad sent to prison? Didn’t I find you after we were separated by the courts?
What do you want from me? You are too cruel. When I write mom and dad I am going to tell them the truth about you. I will not lie for you any more.
You have hurt me so deeply with this betrayal. You can have your slut back if you want her. I don’t want anything of yours, your money or your slut.
HD
May 24th, 2012 at 8:33 am
Becky, this is why I agree with Eric. Cheating is a man’s sport. Women just can’t handle it.
May 24th, 2012 at 8:45 am
Nelson, how is what I wrote indicative that women just can’t handle it? Being true about who you are isn’t limited to gender.
May 24th, 2012 at 8:45 am
Becky, if you knew more you would not be so judgmental. Hank is a respected member of his community and a very religious man.
I had to work wonders to get him into bed in the first place. I can’t help it if I fell in love with him. Now how can I tell him that I am married and that my husband has been taping our bedroom performances?
He threatens to use them if I leave Hank or him. So I am stuck.
Wilma
May 24th, 2012 at 8:48 am
HD and Dylan – is it true incest is best?
May 24th, 2012 at 8:49 am
Becky, Women are more emotional is all I am saying. Like Zen Lill said men can bump uglies without a hitch, mentally or otherwise.
We are just emotionally better suited for cheating.
May 24th, 2012 at 8:54 am
Ceasar, you are just being a bigot. I see nothing wrong with incest as long as children are not a product of it.
My relationship with my partner has lasted longer than others. We each have families but our love in bed has lasted 41 years.
Top that while you are knocking incest. And if you must know YES, YES, YES it is DEFINITELY best!!!!!!!!!
May 24th, 2012 at 8:56 am
My husband cheated on me with my sister. Now I am in prison because they made me kill them. Cheating is just plain wrong.
May 24th, 2012 at 8:58 am
I bet you’re already thinking about the holiday weekend. Backyard full of friends, meat on the grill, cooler full of cold ones.
Now imagine a swarm of ants – with Karl Rove’s face on ‘em – crashing the party.
Karl and his special interest friends are this election’s uninvited guests, spending tens of millions of dollars already on vicious attacks against President Obama and the Democrats.
And if we can’t fight back right now, our majority will be toast (just like that burger you forgot to take off the grill).
He’s not waiting for the summer to heat up. Rove’s attack machine is spitting out $25 million worth of smears this month – and his special interest cronies will unleash an additional $17 million in attacks.
They’re spending like there’s no limit – because, for them, there isn’t.
May 24th, 2012 at 9:03 am
You americans are so backwards. I agree with you FN. I hated my father for years when I found out that he had been having an affair with my twin sister since she was 16.
She started sleeping in his bed a few months after mother died. I always resented him for it. My sister got us together and now he has shown that he loves me too.
I have since realized from therapy that my anger stemmed from jealousy. Now we are a whole family again.
And Yes, incest is best!!!!
SO
May 24th, 2012 at 9:06 am
That’s what drives me crazy about this blog no one stays on topic. We were having an intelligent discussion(thanks to PrP and ZL) about Cheating and then this incest thing rears its ugly head.
Can we get back to the topic people?
Andy
May 24th, 2012 at 9:09 am
Figures don’t lie: Democrats do
by Ann Coulter
It’s been breaking news all over MSNBC, liberal blogs, newspapers and even The Wall Street Journal: “Federal spending under Obama at historic lows … It’s clear that Obama has been the most fiscally moderate president we’ve had in 60 years.” There’s even a chart!
I’ll pause here to give you a moment to mop up the coffee on your keyboard. Good? OK, moving on …
This shocker led to around-the-clock smirk fests on MSNBC. As with all bogus social science from the left, liberals hide the numbers and proclaim: It’s “science”! This is black and white, inarguable, and why do Republicans refuse to believe facts?
Ed Schultz claimed the chart exposed “the big myth” about Obama’s spending: “This chart — the truth — very clearly shows the truth undoubtedly.” And the truth was, the “growth in spending under President Obama is the slowest out of the last five presidents.”
Note that Schultz also said that the “part of the chart representing President Obama’s term includes a stimulus package, too.” As we shall see, that is a big, fat lie.
Schultz’s guest, Reuters columnist David Cay Johnston confirmed: “And clearly, Obama has been incredibly tight-fisted as a president.”
Everybody’s keyboard OK?
May 24th, 2012 at 9:11 am
I cheat because since my wife had 2 children, her pussy is way to big. I want to stay in the marriage but I need to feel something when I am fucking.
Lance
May 24th, 2012 at 9:13 am
Well now Lance thanks for setting us women straight and for giving all us women who get stuck with tiny dick men permission to find something to feel when we fuck.
Alycedale
May 24th, 2012 at 9:16 am
Ceasar some of us are way too smart for our own good. I read HD’s post the first time and did not get that implication.
But having been titillated by you I reread with introspection and attention to detail. And Voila!
Nice get.
Troy
May 24th, 2012 at 9:17 am
Com’on incest is just wrong on so many levels.
May 24th, 2012 at 9:20 am
Marilyn, get a life.
May 24th, 2012 at 2:13 pm
Nelson, I will say this, the majority of males are better suited for cheating for the very reasons I stated and you reiterated, though there is a ‘fringe’ percentage of women who can also indulge without attachment. To me, it’s a mindset and a time in life, in my younger days if I was unattached and very busy working it suited me best to be pragmatic and get the affection/sexual needs met without venturing into the full on romantic relationship, they were caring but loosely held associations, it worked for all involved and I never felt the need to lie.
I do agree with Mischa and the notion still applies that it just feels good when someone you’re digging is digging you back bigtime, love has its place and for a time it is sweet to be ‘the one’ or have ‘the one’
…as far as gaping holes, and teeny weeny’s, well – I will defer to Alycedale.
- ZL