Cheating
Posted by Michelle Moquin on April 27th, 2013
Good morning!
This was sent to me by a loyal reader, who asked that I post this. So here it is brought to you by….ta da….the Huff Po. As if you couldn’t have guessed :)
Cheating Signs: 3 Ways To Identify A Cheater
Let’s face it, men cheat. Well, some of them anyway. And according to numerous studies, it’s more than a handful: approximately 30 to 60 percent of men will cheat on their spouses.
Now, it’s not my intention to upset you with these numbers, because I’m one of those glass-half-full kind of guys. You may be depressed by these figures, but if you look a little deeper under the surface, you will soon realize that for every six men who will cheat, there are four men who will be faithful — and that’s not so bad, is it?
If you’re over the age of 20 — and you haven’t been living with your head in the sand — it should come as no surprise that some men cheat. Whether it’s the President of the United Sates, the top golfer in the world or a world class musician, it’s a proven fact that when it comes to cheating on their spouses, some men just can’t keep it in their pants.
Simply put, those are the guys to stay away from! No matter how good looking they are, how great they are in bed or how much you think they will change once they are with you, the sad fact is that they likely won’t. As my grandmother always used to say: “A leopard doesn’t change his spots.”
The good news is that guys who cheat are pretty transparent and predictable. In fact, I believe that there are three major signs that accurately predict if a guy will cheat on you, and here they are:
1. He’s secretive. Guys who cheat often lead double lives, and in order to do so, they have to cover their tracks. A guy who is secretive and doesn’t reveal much about himself or his life is a guy who is a prime candidate to be featured on an upcoming episode of “Cheaters.”
Communication and the willingness to be an open book are two of the most important indicators of a happy and successful relationship. And if a guy is keeping secrets in the beginning, look out because you are headed for trouble.
2. He’s selfish and self-indulgent.Guys who cheat do so because they are only focused on one thing — themselves. The good news is that guys like these are easy to spot. Guys who are selfish and self-indulgent tend to be like that in all aspects of their lives. If you want to get a good gauge of the moral character and integrity of the man you are dating, look at the way he lives his life and the way he treats others. If you start noticing that he is only out for himself, and he obviously doesn’t care about others (including you) aside from what they can do for him, there is only one thing you should do — run!
3. He has a sudden change in behavior. Cheating guys will suddenly change their behavior, and in numerous ways. He might make a sudden change in his appearance or grooming habits, or it could be a sudden change in his work schedule where all of a sudden he’s working late, has to travel and can’t be reached. But the most common sign is when your sex life decreases, and he shows less of an interest in you in the bedroom.
I’ve never been one to sugar-coat things, and I don’t think that you should be either. There are some guys out there who can’t be trusted and some who can. The key is being able to recognize a potential cheater before the relationship begins.
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Readers: Wha’at’s up? I HOPE that maybe this is helpful for some of you out there. Are you noticing any one of these in your mate? Blog me.
Happy Saturday! Love…give it good.
Lastly, greed over a great story is surfacing from my “loyal”(?) readers. With all this back and forth about who owns what, that appears on my blog, let me reiterate that all material posted on my blog becomes the sole property of my blog. If you want to reserve any proprietary rights don’t post it to my blog. I will prominently display this caveat on my blog from now on to remind those who may have forgotten this notice.
Gratefully your blog host,
michelle
Aka BABE: We all know what this means by now :)
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April 27th, 2013 at 8:59 pm
My husband cheats on me regularly. I have begun to cheat on him when he is out. Oh, the delight in discovering that his bowling buddy has two other balls he handles real well also.
April 27th, 2013 at 9:01 pm
‘ve found a great way to catch a cheater out! My bf was spending more and more time away with work and becoming very protective over his mobile.
We were supposed to be getting married and I was very suspicious of his increasinly dodgy behaviour, so I hired someone to test his faithfulness at http://www.honeytraponline.weebly.com.
I’m really glad I did because within 2 weeks I had solid proof that he was cheating on me – saved me the heartache and expense of a divorce!
April 27th, 2013 at 9:01 pm
I’ve found a great way to catch a cheater out! My bf was spending more and more time away with work and becoming very protective over his mobile.
We were supposed to be getting married and I was very suspicious of his increasinly dodgy behaviour, so I hired someone to test his faithfulness at http://www.honeytraponline.weebly.com.
I’m really glad I did because within 2 weeks I had solid proof that he was cheating on me – saved me the heartache and expense of a divorce!
April 27th, 2013 at 9:05 pm
How to Catch a Cheating Spouse
1
Jot down the spouse’s activities in a journal. Keep track of the dates and times, reported destinations and other parties said to be present or involved. Mention outings casually in front of parties who were said to be involved.
2
Check the journal entries against credit card statements, bank records and ATM withdrawals. Look for credit card transactions at restaurants where the spouse reportedly ate. Make a note of expenditures at places other than the reported locations.
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3
Review cell phone records, which list all incoming and outgoing calls and their duration. Look for repeated calls to and from unfamiliar numbers. Use an online reverse number look-up service to determine to whom the number belongs.
4
Check the incoming and outgoing text messaging on the cell phone regularly. Examine the cell phone contacts to see the name label on the phone number to which the texts are sent. Use “caller ID spoofing” to call suspicious numbers (see Resources).
5
Observe activities at office gatherings or work functions. Notice when the spouse avoids a specific co-worker but keeps track of the individual’s movements and exchanges frequent looks.
6
Come home early from work. Announce plans to work late and then arrive home early. Drop in at the office and surprise the spouse with a lunch invitation. Observe the reaction or make notes as to the spouse’s absence from the office.
7
Install monitoring software on the home computer that allows the recording of online chat, web surfing, logon info and passwords. Look for memberships to online dating services.
April 27th, 2013 at 9:55 pm
My husband has been cheating on me with his secretary. Sounds cliche. So does this. I have also been cheating on him with her.
When I confronted her three months ago, she started to cry and said that she didn’t want to. She said that she was basically gay, but that she was afraid of losing her job and that she needed the medical care because her sister’s son was on it.
I told her that I had experienced love with a woman in college and that she was so beautiful I could see why she was so attractive to my husband.
She hugged me crying and I couldn’t help myself. I kissed her. When we got out of bed, we knew it would not end with just a fling.
April 27th, 2013 at 10:05 pm
I caught my husband in a lie about being at a business meeting. I decided to tap his cell phone. The emails were so enlightening. The ass was even cheating on his mistresses.
I divorced him. He was so surprised that I knew were he kept his secret bank accounts. He was also surprised when I sued him for the money he spent on his mistresses.
April 27th, 2013 at 10:28 pm
I wonder if men know how much it hurts to be so faithful to a person only to find out that you have been betrayed.
April 27th, 2013 at 10:54 pm
My dreams of a happy family with you and our three kids was shattered you decided to have an affair with our baby sitter.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:12 am
I called alot of people on the media hysteria and – I am ashamed to admit this – prayed that it would be a white guy who turned out to do it, just because I didn’t want the narrative to be that easy.
Michelle,you are one of the few voices I’ve seen who is willing to stop being irrational and swallow the convenient story and actually act like an American citizen ought to – with skepticism.
Just about any negative adjective or vulgar word you want to throw at Dzhokhar, he’s earned, and I have no sympathy for him beyond this – he’s an American citizen that was illegally detained and denied his 5th amendment rights and it’s not OK just because he’s my enemy when his rights are the same ones I have.
Trampling on them for him means it’s ok to toss out mine if I don’t have popular opinion. That disturbs me alot more than the arguments that we hear concerning the 2nd Amendment.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:17 am
In the movie “Die Hard,” the villian, when asked for a list of “demands,” has to explain to the police that he and his gang are not terrorists but theives. This illustrates the difference between mass murder and terrorism. To qualify as terrorism, an act has to have some political or social goal that the terrorist or terrorists hopes to achieve via coercion. The Oklahoma City Bombing is categorized as a terrorist act and Timothy McVeigh was an American terrorist because he had a political and social agenda. He hoped to inspire a revolt against what he considered to be a tyrannical federal government.
Your are correct to compare McViegh to the Boston bomber; they, too, had a political and social agenda. They hoped to put pressure on the U.S. goverment to cease U.S. military o[perations in Islamic countries. However, Adam Lanza, the Newtown shooter, has no apparent political or social agenda. He was simply a mass murder.
Mass murders never become heroes, except, perhaps, to other deranged individuals. However, some terrorists become heroes, when their cause is perceived as just. For example, Nelson Mandela formned a terrorist group, Umkhonto we Sizwe, and led a bombing campaign
April 28th, 2013 at 8:28 am
Caring for Our Nation’s Heroes
We must honor the service of all of our men and women in uniform, remember those who perished at war, and celebrate the courage of those who come home. In Congress, our work is founded on a solemn promise: just as the military pledges to leave no soldier behind on the battlefield, we will leave no veteran behind when they return home.
Yesterday, I hosted a roundtable with veterans service organizations and advocacy groups as part of ongoing efforts to discuss and address the critical issues facing our nation’s service members and their families, as well as veterans. More than a dozen Democratic Members attended the roundtable and raised serious concerns about the growing veterans disability claims backlog and announced a legislative package of 10 bills to address the underlying issues.
Congresswoman Pelosi and House Democrats hold a roundtable with veterans service organizations and advocacy groups.
Here in Congress, every day is an opportunity to honor the sacrifices of our service members and their families and to ensure we serve them as well as they served us. We have a solemn responsibility to care for our men and women in uniform, on the battlefield and at home. We must act to strengthen the Department of Veterans Affairs, speed up the claims process, and extend economic opportunity to our veterans. It is the least we can do for those who sacrifice so much on behalf of our security and our freedom.
As we honor our veterans, we must always remember our MIAs and POWs. They will not be forgotten. Our nation can never fully repay the debt of gratitude we owe to the courageous men and women who have worn our nation’s uniform.
For more information on services offered to San Francisco’s veterans through my office, please click here.
Celebrating Earth Day
For more than four decades, Earth Day has brought Americans together to honor our moral responsibility to preserve our planet, protect our environment, and address the pressing challenge of climate change. Across the country, families and students spend this day serving their communities, cleaning up their neighborhoods, promoting conservation, and participating in the effort to ensure clean air, clean water, and a cleaner planet.
On Earth Day, Democrats and Republicans must no longer treat our environment as a point of partisan political debate. We must work side-by-side with the American people to create a future of sustainability for our children and grandchildren, prosperity and opportunity for our families and communities, and security and energy independence for generations to come.
Return to Order on the Budget
Last week, the House Democratic Leadership and I sent a letter to Speaker of the House John Boehner calling on the Speaker to appoint House conferees without further delay and follow regular order to reach an agreement on a budget focused on jobs, economic growth, balanced deficit reduction, and a strong, thriving middle class.
Click here to see the full text of the letter.
Please feel free to forward this information to your family and friends. To learn more about these efforts, to express your views, or to sign up for email updates, please visit my website. I am also on Twitter at http://twitter.com/NancyPelosi.
best regards,
April 28th, 2013 at 8:36 am
The Republicans stupidity has gone so far out of the realm of sanity, it shows the American people why we don’t want them for leaders. The people I pity are the ones who believe their messages of hate and lies.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:39 am
Many, many years ago, Ted Koppel interviewed spokesman for a neo-nazi group that was taking off in the US. The individual was well-spoken, careful with what he said, and reasonable sounding–even charming.
In the middle of the interview, Koppel cut away to a second guest from Southern Poverty Law Center and cut to the chase: “how do we counter these sorts of lies?”(or words to that effect). It was refreshing. And it wouldn’t happen now.
The problem these days is that when a tea-party guest says crazy or stupid things, the media don’t call them on it. Last year at this time, John Hockenberry of NPR’s The Takeaway was interviewing a state GOP chairman about the presidential primary in his state, and the GOP guy started talking about the epidemic of Marxism under Obama along with some other crazy nonsense.
And Hockenberry let it slide, didn’t call the guy on his understanding of Marxism or the Kenyan birth assertion (also worked in) or anything else.
Some time in the last decade, it became taboo to call guests (especially wingers) on utter BS. And in the dog-whistle politics of right wing America, this was seen as ‘proof’ that their central assertions were correct.
I have my problems with the Obama-bots as well (silence on drone strikes exhibit A), but a media cowed by the right wing serves no one.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:50 am
Blair#10, The “terrorists” in South Africa were the white invaders who used tanks, aircraft and other weapons to terrorize, murder, enslave and exploit the people of that country for more than 50 years.
One cannot be a terrorist while resisting the occupation of a few colonist embarked upon enslaving them. Hence Nelson Mandela was not and could not be classified as “terrorists” except by white bastards like you who attempt at every opportunity to reconstruct history to hide or disguise the evil shit you have done to OTWs.
WHATEVER the people did to your white race to force them to unlock the chains they had on the true citizens of South Africa was just. Too bad they did not have the character of their white oppressors or they would have killed everyone of the sons of bastards.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:52 am
The term “Obama Derangement Syndrome” has been around for some time and it’s as good a way to describe it as any.
I was concerned about it in November but now that the elections are over, not so much. Clearly the American electorate has more good sense that to swallow it.
Clearly I was with the majority on this and thought Romney was a far greater threat to the American economy that a President who, frankly I had hoped would become a Democrat in his second term.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:52 am
Progressives said the EXACT same thing about Bush after 911…even though he was in office less than 9 months.
Quit whining.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:53 am
Republicans phony flag lapel pin patriotism, has been evident every since this President took office, During the Bush years we witness their ranting against anyone who question the wars and how they were prosecuted, along with their disregard for spending and the rape of the treasury, and the giving of tax cuts while at war.
These people are adapt hypocrites, and their hypocrisy has not gone unnoticed.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:54 am
I find it refreshing to make a parlor game of it. The reply is always “It’s Obama’s fault”
The questions can be anything you like. My favorite was when a girl who didn’t know we were playing the game walked in and commented “Oh, my cat had kittens!” and everyone called out at once “It’s Obama’s fault!” We laughed and laughed.
April 28th, 2013 at 8:57 am
Guss, the nine-month mark for W was after 9/11. The Progressives who were talking about 9/11 were talking about the massive failure of intelligence and White House inattention to important things. And they were right.