Sabina:  When I read your comment, I thought ‘What is she talking about?’ Then I googled and found that you were not kidding. China Spring Airlines doesn’t have enough planes to meet their demand in flights so they’re taking out the seat and putting in stools.  Ya know like commuter buses, only they’ll have stools and you’ll be strapped in.

“For a lower price, passengers should be able to get on a plane like catching a bus, with no seat, no luggage consignment, no food, no water, but very convenient.”

I can tell you right now, this is not my kind of travel.

Anonymous: I read your comment and starting laughing at how ridiculous the police story was. I had no idea who you were talking about so once again this morning I used the power of the net. Now I know, and by the way, I think your take on it is much more plausible. What a sad and horrible outcome.

Brittany, Toni, Lauren:  You are welcome. It doesn’t surprise me that many women can relate. It is in our nature or maybe our comfort zone too, to be mini marriages. This regret of not exercising my rights does not way heavy on me. I really enjoyed my monogamy. It’s easy to say I wish I had done something different but I can’t miss the learning that I never had, so I move on. The recognition of it and being able to articulate it and understand it is enough for me right now. I know there are many more life lessons that will reveal themselves. There always are :)

Johanne: I feel honored that printed out my article for your girls. I think of what my reaction would’ve been at their ages, and the effect, an article like that would’ve had on me. What would I do differently then? How would my life be different now? Thank you for trusting that I would be a positive influence in their lives.

Paula: All I can say is I’m laughing and honored that my article got some air time.

Barbara:  I don’t know about your daughters situation but it seems you can see something in her marriage that she hasn’t or is not willing to see . Whatever insight this article may bring to her, I am hopeful she will make the right decision for herself.

Vicky: Nothing against therapy; I think it has it’s place in the world. I certainly have had my share of it. But your story is a common one; the 11 years part. I am happy that my write obviously cut through the crap and got to the meat of it for you.

Susan: What a thoughtful son. Thank you.

Lenny: Please tell me you’re joking.

Nancy: Thanks for sharing your story. It would not surprise me if you are correct.

Rona:  I’m not sure that I can say that I am happy that I have inspired women to get divorced. I say that very lightly as I know that I don’t have that kind of influence.  I will say that I have no doubt that it is something that has probably been on your mind and my write has inspired you to look at things differently and possibly take the next step. I wish you well.

TAO: Happy to see your written words.

Afsaneh, Batul, Fakhri: Tell me….Madaline, our ‘genie in a bottle’…Does she have her usual CFM attire, with her DFWM ( don’t fuck with me) attitude?

Oh, peeps I still have more to say  but time is not expanding to meet my needs this morning. I tried to get up earlier but after yesterday’s early rise, this girl needed her beauty sleep. And now I must dress and dash.

Se ya tomorrow…

Gratefully your blog host,

michelle

Aka BABE: Your Bad Ass Bitch Editor

For archives dated before January 17, 2008 click on my Blogroll:

or click here: “A Day in the life of…”

All content on this site are property of Michelle Moquin © copyright 2009

" Politics, god, Life, News, Music, Family, Personal, Travel, Random, Photography, Religion, Aliens, Art, Entertainment, Food, Books, Thoughts, Media, Culture, Love, Sex, Poetry, Prose, Friends, Technology, Humor, Health, Writing, Events, Movies, Sports, Video, Christianity, Atheist, Blogging, History, Work, Education, Business, Fashion, Barack Obama, People, Internet, Relationships, Faith, Photos, Videos, Hillary Clinton, School, Reviews, God, TV, Philosophy, Fun, Science, Environment, Design, The Page, Rants, Pictures, Church, Blog, Nature, Marketing, Television, Democrats, Parenting, Miscellaneous, Current Events, Film, Spirituality, Obama, Musings, Home, Human Rights, Society, Comedy, Me, Random Thoughts, Research, Government, Election 2008, Baseball, Opinion, Recipes, Children, Iraq, Funny, Women, Economics, America, Misc, Commentary, John McCain, Reflections, All, Celebrities, Inspiration, Lifestyle, Theology, Linux, Kids, Games, World, India, Literature, China, Ramblings, Fitness, Money, Review, War, Articles, Economy, Journal, Quotes, NBA, Crime, Anime, Islam, 2008, Stories, Prayer, Diary, Jesus, Buddha, Muslim, Israel, Europe, Links, Marriage, Fiction, American Idol, Software, Leadership, Pop culture, Rants, Video Games, Republicans, Updates, Political, Football, Healing, Blogs, Shopping, USA, Class, Matrix, Course, Work, Web 2.0, My Life, Psychology, Gay, Happiness, Advertising, Field Hockey, Hip-hop, sex, fucking, ass, Soccer, sox"

Good morning.

First of all, thanks to Zen Lill for bringing forth such interesting subjects about relationships. And thanks to ZL, Robert and the readers who have commented on the subject, adding such excitement to the blog banter these past two days.

The topic has inspired my write this morning. And it has hit me on so many different levels as I compare what has been expressed to what I have experienced in my own life, and those around me. I don’t know anything about the percentages discussed. As I said, I can only go by my own experiences, my family life, and what I hear from my girlfriends, their husbands, and the men in my life.

However, as far as divorces are concerned, I have to agree with Robert, that it is the men who initiate divorce more than women. I don’t personally have too many friends that have gone through the divorce process, but I can tell you that I have witnessed the divorce of many of my parents’ friends, as I grew up, and it has been predominately the men who have done the walking, and most of the time they have a younger woman attached to their arm. Regardless of the years that the wife has given up to raise his children and support his career. He finally makes it with her support, and all of a sudden he is king of the household gathering his harem on the side. Once again, I am not referring to all men, but many have chosen this route.

I also agree that men want to be taken care of. I grew up with my father not participating in my younger years hardly at all. He was too busy livng out his artistic career,  and playing tennis with his buddies. My mother did everything in the house and cared for him in every way. He refused to ever clean the house, help with the dishes, or do anything domestic. And when after many years they finally divorced, my father barely knew how to cook anything but pasta. His mother did everything for him when he was growing up and my mother took over that roll when they got married. Sound good to me – “Hell, I want a wife too.” But unless I go lesbo, that just isn’t going to happen.

Women need to get a clue and stop perpetuating this cycle that does us no good. As Madaline says, “Woman up.”

On a side note, and I may have blogged this before, but it is worth repeating: It reminds me of a time about 10 years ago.  A male friend of mine was trying to encourage me to have children explaining to me how my priorities would change when I did. I retorted, “I like my life. I don’t want my priorities to change. Did yours change? No. You’re still mountain biking every weekend with the guys”. I sat and watched him take another sip of a beer, smiling away, while his wife sat in the corner breast feeding their three-month old, with their other two-year old pulling at her leg.

So back to divorce. When a woman gets to the point in her life where she doesn’t want to do everything anymore, when she’s tired of being the maid or the mommy to full grown men….after she has been doing it her whole life, yeah…I can understand why the man would get a bit pissy from her change that is affecting his life…why he might want a divorce. He’s use to being taken care of, and when all of a sudden he finds that he has to do some things for himself, the mind begins to think, and the little head takes over…. “I think I’ll find myself another woman who will take care of me. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do.” He usually ends up with a younger woman until she wakes up, and then he’s off deep in the hunt again.  So, it is no surprise that many older women are living at the poverty level, while the man continues to hunt ‘n peck.

Like Robert says, there isn’t too much a man will put up with when they’re used to getting it good and knowing that there will always be someone else who will give them what they want, should the good go south at home.  Women, on the other hand will put up with  tons of crap before they decide to leave. I don’t know any men that are absolutely miserable in their marriage but I know quite a few women who are. And yet the remain married, in spite of the fact that they have caught their husbands with their pants down, lying and cheating, and hitting on some of their closest friends. And yet nothing is said.  This is in a group that has known each other for years and the money is free flowing….as well as the pasted on public smiles that all is grand – “We’re rich aren’t we? We should be happy.” I no longer hang with this group much  – Doug and I were always the outsiders, yet I can’t tell you how many conversations I had where they expressed their unhappiness and how they envied our relationship….how they would give up the riches just to have their husbands pay a little attention to them. Sad, but even sadder that the women put up with it…that they are choosing to stay, when they don’t have to.

So maybe these men aren’t asking for divorces, but why would they? They flirt openly, they cheat, they blatantly lie, and their wives still remain loyal. They have a for sure thing at home and whatever they want on the side. They are having their cake and eating it too. If I were them, I wouldn’t get divorced either.

As far as men (90%) not wanting to get married. ZL, that seems way high to me. I know quite a few women who have turned men down for marriage two and three times, and I’m not talking from the same man. And I definitely think that the more financially independent a woman is these days, the more she is opting out of marriage. Women aren’t feeling the need nor do they feel they have to especially when she knows she doesn’t have to rely on him financially.

And in my own experiences with relationships, although I have not had more than one man drop down-to-his-knee proposing marriage, the men that I have had, intimate relationships with, were the ones that initiated the subject of marriage, not me. In my last relationship, pre-marriage to Doug, he practically begged me to marry him when I decided to finally end it for good. When I finally fucked someone other than him, he went berserk. Knowing him as well as I did, I thought he would be okay with it, but he wasn’t – oops – bad move.  I didn’t get it then, but years later I finally did. He was no longer in control. He no longer owned this thing between my legs. So Robert, you’re right. Men can fuck around, but the minute they know someone else is in their stuff, and they’re not the one in control, they can’t take it.

Even in regards to Doug, and I’m sure he won’t mind me posting this, he initiated marriage. I had no idea he was going to propose. And I kept putting the marriage date off, once I said ‘yes’. I wasn’t ready, and quite frankly, I wanted him to get his life together. ( Those weren’t exactly the words I used, but I am being kind here, and he knows it :)

But Robert, what really struck a cord for me most out of your enlightening post was your part about women only having one relationship at a time: mini marriages. It wasn’t an ‘Aha!” moment for me. I have known since I got older that I limited my choices when I was younger. That I did not exercise my rights to choose like I could have. The ‘Aha!” moment for me was how you articulated the benefit of dating more than one man at a time, that I was serious about. I knew that I was missing something from my lack of choices when I was younger, I  just didn’t know what it was nor could I put it into words or take it to the level that you have.

So that being said, you are so correct. That was me. That was my life. I have been in  mini marriages ever since I learned how to spread these thighs, and commit myself to one. I remember thinking that when I finally got married it was no different than what I had been doing in every past relationship. I eased into it very naturally. But why wouldn’t I when I had been in mini marriages from day one?

In every mini marriage,  loyal I was. I prided myself on being a one man woman. I liked being loyal. No one said I had to be but I liked it. I had plenty of chances to fool around but I chose not to. I liked the fact that a man demanded ownership over this, but I was foolish to think that meant that he would be loyal too. That is why, on the one hand, I am big on men keeping their little secrets to themselves. Unrealistic as it may be, for some to think that their man is loyal to only her…but then Ignorance can be blissful. Yet on the other hand, competition can spark up the bedroom.

But my biggest regret in relationships was that I didn’t date. And that was of no blame to my family. My mother always said that I was too young to be so serious with one boy. But I didn’t listen. I made commitments and when I no longer wanted to be in the relationship, I  was the one who did the breaking up. I was never dumped. And there was always another one waiting in the wings.

I, unfortunately did not have the good advice to date more than one boy or even more than one man, at the same time, for that matter. But who knows if I would’ve listened anyhow. I loved having one boyfriend, and relished the thought that he only needed and desired me. Young, immature thoughts.

It wasn’t until I got much older that I wished that I had played the field a lot more. I can’t stress enough how I never made the choice…how I NEVER chose the person I wanted to date, or be in a relationship with. I was ALWAYS the chosen one.

Yes, there were some in between men that were very short lived, and sex was the draw there; nothing more. I knew that they were not relationship material for me, therefore I was never serious about them. But once again, they initiated the choosing of me. I still never chose them. The only choice I made was to not continue to the next level.

When I have spoken to my girlfriends about my past relationships, I have always said that if I could do it over, I would be the one to choose who I wanted to date. I would be the one who would go out for the hunt, so to speak. I have never felt that I took advantage of my opportunities to choose. Men in my life chose me. They always have. I would date them for awhile, not seeing anyone else of course, and then I would make a commitment if I wanted to go to the next level.  My whole relationship life I was into mini marriages….one after the other, after the other, after the other. I was never without a boyfriend, therefore I could never make that comparison…I was never serious about two men at the same time. I could never say, ‘Show me why I should be with you instead of the other guy I’m dating? Show me why I should make a commitment to you instead of him?” ‘What do you have to offer me that is better than so ‘n so?”

I always gave myself to one man, one at a time. My choice of men were narrowed down to the ones who chose me. It is as simple as that. And all that being said, I conclude that I not only limited my options by only dating men that chose me, as I never did the choosing, but that I missed  a growth opportunity by never dating two men that I was having more than casual sex with, at the same time.

Do I regret that I didn’t exercise my rights to choose? Yes. Do I regret the choice that I made in marrying Doug? No, not at all. He is a good man. My lack of not exercising my right to choose has nothing to do with him. Would I have still chosen Doug? Who knows how my choices would’ve affected my life, but I have no regret that I did. I have learned tremendously in my marriage, and I am grateful for the lessons.

Women have rights in this country, that many women in this world don’t. Read Anjali and Heba’s comments if you haven’t. My regret is that I didn’t exercise those rights…my right to choose, so that I could have learned and grown from the experience.

I feel I’m starting to be redundant, so I will end it here. I think you get my point.

Ok, I thought I was done. I wrote this last night. But like you Zen Lill and Anna, the topic was heavy on my mind and I woke up with thoughts of marriage infiltrating my sleep. I couldn’t get back to sleep, so although it is 4:18 am, I decided to get up and let the words flow from my mind to the computer, before they were lost. These are my thoughts:

Women romanticize marriage. Look at weddings. Weddings are designed for women, not men. The wedding is the big send off from the mini marriage into full marriage. Otherwise not much else changes. As I said, I noticed this when I got married. Maybe some women are disappointed, but they shouldn’t be. Getting married doesn’t change the relationship, it just seals whatever deal you made, consciously or unconsciously. Or, at least it gives you hope that the deal you made will be honored.

So, let’s take the romance out of marriage and break it down.

Women want a relationship so of course women want to get married. Marriage is designed for women to make the woman think that her man will honor his vows. And in some marriages the man will honor his vows. Not all men dishonor their vows and become unfaithful. But if a man is going to cheat in a mini marriage where he has told his woman, ‘Baby you’re the only one. I’m not seeing anyone else’, a piece of paper , and a big wedding where he takes his vows, is most likely not going to stop him from cheating in marriage.

If she is under the impression that he has been faithful their entire married life and discovers his infidelities, that is one thing. But a woman’s biggest mistake if she knows her man is cheating in a mini marriage, is thinking that he won’t in full marriage. Either of those happening is when disappointment can set in and the dream of marriage can be shattered. Everything else about a man should be no surprise to the woman. ( At least not outside of the norm – we’re not talking about pedophiles or serial killers here. ) A woman knows exactly what she is getting in to when she marries her man and there is no excuse to think that now he is married he is going to change.

Men want to stake their claim, so of course men want to get married too. Marriage is designed for men to take their meat off the market. For them, knowing how women desire relationships….knowing that women will be loyal in mini marriages,  the wedding, the big send off into marriage, is just added insurance that they own their woman and she will remain loyal. And in most marriages it does. However, not all women are faithful. And as much as men want to dip into something different every now and then, it is not okay for their piece of meat to do the same. If a man has steak every night, every once in awhile he’s gonna want some beans. He may want to nibble on the beans once in awhile, and the beans may not mean that much to him, but make no mistake, he considers the steak his, lock, stock and barrel.

I conclude that most people don’t change. So my logic tells me that what you see in a mini marriage is most likely what you’re going to get in full marriage. Make an intelligent decision from the choices that you have, and as Robert pointed out, a way to do that is by honing your dating skills.

I’m almost done. I just have to say a few words to say in regards to the comment of women suppressing their natural sexual desires. This is really a question, and relates to Robert’s running list of the actions men take to prevent women from acting on their sexual needs.

If it was truly the case (women suppressing their natural sexual desires), why would men withhold something from women that they would naturally withhold from themselves?

Ok, I’m done.

Thanks again Zen Lill for bringing up such a charged topic.  And thanks you Robert for confirming some of what I already knew, but couldn’t articulate or truly understand until I read your write. Obviously it struck a cord and I had much to say. Thanks for letting and getting out the word from a males point of view. Obviously your honesty has been much appreciated by the women readers. I hope that many single women will heed your advice.

Deepti, Fatima, Mehtarlam: My pleasure. I learned something too. :)

Readers: Comments? Anything to add? Blog me.

Gratefully your blog host,

michelle

Aka BABE: Your Bad Ass Bitch Editor

For archives dated before January 17, 2008 click on my Blogroll:

or click here: “A Day in the life of…”

All content on this site are property of Michelle Moquin © copyright 2009

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Well I guess I’m on a roll with this relationship thing. If I’m going to find good advice for going through the big “D”, I might as well end it in a positive note too, with a new beginning. This article isn’t about divorce, but divorce can be tough…the big “D”- ‘Divorce’ can be big “D” – ‘Difficult’.  This article is all about making it through those difficult times by….

FINDING STRENGTH IN THE FACE OF TRAGEDY

Glance at the front page of any newspaper these days and odds are good you will see the words “hard times.” Our national problems are spawning many personal woes, it’s true, but personal hard times can strike at any point… in your relationships, on the job, with the kids, and, of course, in matters of health. As life coach and Daily Health News frequent contributor Lauren Zander says, “Eventually your number is going to come up — bad stuff happens to everyone.” She is quick to add that while there is much you can do to prevent trouble, some of it is simply the unfolding of life. The challenge, she says, is to accept life’s blows as part of the journey, to learn from them and emerge stronger and wiser, rather than to create unnecessary drama that drags you down a path of misery.

We deal with hard times in several predictable ways. One approach is to cower and complain and use your bad luck to fuel comparisons to the experiences of others: “You think that’s bad, wait till you hear what happened to me!” But no one can possibly judge another’s hard time or determine whose is worse. Your tough time is tough and it is yours. Then there are those who take this concept of ownership too far, says Lauren, wrapping their hardship in a shroud of secrecy — such as the guy who got fired but tells nearly no one, pretending to many in his life that it simply didn’t happen. Or the person who suffers silently as a close family member spirals downward from substance abuse. Attempting to hide a hard time shows you don’t understand the most basic thing about it – everyone gets kicked by life sooner or later. Lauren’s advice is to accept what happens in much the way we accept puberty — as a part of life filled with challenges and all sorts of feelings, including humiliation. We all experienced it and we all understand.

THE UPSIDE OF BAD THINGS

Being open about what is happening in your life offers several specific benefits. First it allows you to demonstrate your attitude toward the matter, and thus signal to others what you would like from them, be it a lot of help or a little. It also helps you process your emotions, far better than stuffing them inside and hoping they’ll stay put. When you’re having marital trouble, for instance, the last thing you might want from a friend is for her to turn into Sally Sunshine, reassuring you earnestly that everything will be just fine… but, on the other hand, you won’t benefit from constant hand-wringing and shrill assessments about how awful it all is. Hard times make people feel separate and isolated from others and, to some degree, from life itself. Try to let people around you know that you don’t want them to over- or under-respond to your struggle. Help them understand how to be supportive.

In fact, the second benefit of sharing bad news is just that — an important opportunity to gather support. Many people secretly crave more attention from friends and loved ones than they get on a day-to-day basis. Ironically, tragedy can open that door, bringing you emotional support you need, which makes you feel loved. Be frank with others that you are devastated by debt, a diagnosis, a divorce… it will tell your friends and family that you need comfort and attention. Keeping matters to yourself will cut you off from what you need most.

FINDING THE WAY

Seen in the rearview mirror, hard times offer the opportunity to see how difficulties in the past have contributed to who you are today. To learn how the patterns and personality you developed over the years has shaped how you react to difficulties, Lauren urges you not to wait for another to hit. Make a list of awful experiences in your life, along with what you did to handle them — for better or for worse. Maybe you demonstrated amazing pluck publicly but consoled yourself each evening with pints of ice cream. Perhaps you shared nasty stories about the lover or boss who spurned you at every opportunity, but then cleaned every closet, lost 10 pounds and went to the gym daily. Or maybe you mostly just sat home and closed off the world. “The crucial thing to explore in this exercise is whether your pattern involved withdrawing… being destructive… or making changes that turned out to be productive. The more you know from your history including the traps you fall into and the ways you strengthen yourself to emerge better from a tough event, the better equipped you are to handle the hard times in the future,” points out Lauren.

For all the pain hard times cause, the truth is they also come bearing a gift… really. Hard times force change. At first you probably won’t like it, says Lauren, but a change — however dumped on you — presents the opportunity to do something different. Look around at those you know who were suddenly faced with loneliness during early retirement who started volunteering and met a whole new group of friends… who lost their home in a fire or flood and took the opportunity, then, to rebuild something they liked even better… or emerged from a painful breakup more capable and independent with a life that is more interesting, exciting and satisfying. And, there are many, many stories of cancer survivors who found an entirely new perspective on life after their diagnosis and treatment.

MAKE A PLAN

When life wallops you, Lauren says it is totally reasonable to throw a pity party and lick your wounds and feel dreadful about what has happened… for a while. (This advice does not pertain to people dealing with the death of a loved one — bereavement is a separate issue and for that Lauren recommends finding one of many excellent bereavement experts to help guide you through.) You need this time to process the event and your feelings. You may even benefit from joining a group with whom you can share your feelings and thoughts if, for example, your teenager is in trouble or a spouse is seriously ill. This can help you to work through feelings faster and more thoroughly, says Lauren. Whether in a group or by yourself, the trap to avoid as you process your pain is blame… be it the world, your genes, your rotten luck or that old standby, other people. Blaming turns people into victims, a true no-win position.

How long you devote to feeling sorry for yourself depends on the harshness of the blow and the reality of your current situation. If money is tight and you just lost your job, you obviously need to get a new one fast. Find people to talk to who will bring a fresh perspective. It is also important to do good things for yourself such as getting out for a long walk or taking a yoga class. “Seek out activities that are healthy and cathartic and will distract you from your problems. This will help re-engage you in what is good about life,” says Lauren.  Now is the time to refer to your list of past challenges… what were the skills you saw in yourself that you can draw on now to move ahead? Did you divert your attention to avoid behavior that would be unproductive? Did you get back on the metaphorical horse and try again? Lauren recommends that her clients use the strength they gained from the past, avoid what didn’t work and learn even more from the current problem. Whatever you do, don’t give up and give in. As Lauren says, “However bad it might seem at the outset, a hard time is yet another chance to rise to the occasion with choices and behavior that will turn you into a hero in your own life.”

Source(s): Lauren Zander, founder and chairman, HandelGroup, a private coaching and corporate consulting company, www.handelgroup.com.

As I read this article, the saying, ‘And this too shall pass’ keeps popping up. And as much as I know this to be true, sometimes it is very frustrating when you find yourself saying, ‘And this too shall pass’….way too many times during the week or even during the day. Enough already!  But kidding aside, there is some good advice here. ‘Accept and learn’…because although ‘And this too shall pass’, whatever just passed might come back and bite you in the ass if you didn’t accept the situation and learn something from it. Remember: “What you resist persists.” Got it? Aren’t you just hating me right now?

************

Mendy: I aims to please – enjoy that little mission. :)

Anna: That artists’ corner sounds awesome. You sure are tapped into ‘la scene’ in Guam. When I make it over to  the island some day I would love for you and Peter to take me around. Hafa Adai.

Thanks too for sharing the article on Presnell. With women being considered and treated as second class citizens in Iran, the double standard that Presnell spoke of, doesn’t surprise me. The women have a huge challenge on their hands.

Brenda:  And there’s attitude behind my talk and shake within my walk too, girl :) Stay tuned for more hot topics.

Janet: Well…I am delighted that your mother turned you on to tune in. Maybe she knew that two-timer of yours was supporting a little on the side – you know mothers and their keen instincts when it comes to their children. I ought to know – my mother taps into it all of the time. I’m sure that you’ll make the right decision for yourself.

Lois & Martha: My pleasure. And thanks for the post on Franken – this is good news! – you too Thomas.

Bobby: Your un-edited townhall post just leaves me stunned. Isn’t it the repugs who get us into debt…you know the ones that claim to be so fiscally responsible, and the dems that pull them out of it EVERY time? Who reads and believes this propaganda?

Hey Zen Lill: I remember when your atty said that to you – we talked about it….’famous last words’ huh? I hope not for your sake, and that you are correct in your thoughts.

Brea:  Me too, thanks. :)

Peace’n out again….

Gratefully your blog host,

michelle

Aka BABE: Your Bad Ass Bitch Editor

For archives dated before January 17, 2008 click on my Blogroll:

or click here: “A Day in the life of…”

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Oh so many topics these past few days. I just want to jump in on the convos and verbalize my thoughts today. Okay?

Choe:  I know of the morning Joe show but I have not had the opportunity to watch ‘Joe’ nor ‘Mika’. But you have peaked my interest and I will try and check it out. Though, I did google Mika and found a youtube video of her on the show. The headlining topic was about Paris Hilton and she was just adamant about not covering the story….wanting to cover real news. I don’t see her as some ditzy T & A blond…oh no you said, ‘hair and tits’…I don’t know. I can’t give a fair enough opinion without checking her out a bit more. I’ll keep you posted.

Anonymous: You obviously do not like her.

In regards to Sanford…I have enjoyed reading all of the comments that you’ve made. I feel bad for his family…to have his affair be so public. He was obviously thinking with the little head instead of the big head as ‘discretion out of respect’ was not in the forefront of his mind. As I said the other day…”most men cheat”. I actually want to retract that statement. I don’t think most men cheat…but I think ‘many’ do. If one is going to have an affair, at least don’t flaunt it. Ok…Maybe he wasn’t flaunting the affair,  but being a public figure, one has to be more careful than the average Joe. Now look at where his oh-so-intimate e-mails have landed him.

But I agree, the worst part of it, is not only that his family has to live with the embarrassment of the world knowing their personal business, but the fact that he is a benchmark for hypocrisy, alongside many other religious rights. I get so tired of the posturing…in politics and here in the personal. Zip the lip….thou is protesting too much. And I agree, the only reason they are admitting and apologizing is because they got caught. Simple as that. But hey, let’s not leave out some of the liberal lefts either – they are not immune from the temptations in life, they just don’t go around moralizing while surreptitiously sexing it up. And yes, I too want to know if our tax dollars have been funding his little affair.

Oh George: I love when you swear and get all worked up. However, your talkin’ the talk is coming up short lately. Your talk usually makes up for what you lack in the sack, but this time I think you measured up correctly.

So…I went to a white trash party a few weeks ago and thought about you. Here I am sporting my fave white trash slutfit, complete with daisy duke shorts, my trucker hat, stiletto sneakers, and a Marlboro stuck in my mouth – your kind of girl right? – So c’mon…use this piece of meat! – Can you handle this bitch? Imagine these legs wrapped around your waist. Oh that’s right…I forgot…I’m not your type. Too bad, I could use a good spanking.

Ah…now where was I? Oh…

Al: Again, you make me laugh. I am not mad at you- your words do not have that power over me – why would they? Your comments border on  the insane and illogical- now don’t be mad at me :) You are simply entertaining. Friends? It is your choice whether we are friends or not by your flip-the-switch attitude. So…where are we today Al?

Anonymous and proud of it: You have made a very good point. You are correct that I would not want my readers to be curbed.  However, am I quietly laughing? I wouldn’t say that.  Would I rather they comment anonymously than not comment at all? Of course. But would I not allow anonymous comments? Never.  I will however admit that I have to make more of an effort to read them and focus on the subject at hand, and let go of making a connection to the anonymous anonymouses. I like the familiar; what can I say? I like the connection because I like people, but I respect the need to be anonymous, even more. So there you have it – Keep it coming.

As far as gays, lesbians, bisexuals, whatever…I think we all have the ability, tendency to ‘swing and switch’. You can be born knowing that you only desire the opposite or same sex, or you can have a bad experience with the opposite sex and veer toward the same sex….or you can have an incredible experience with the same sex and never want to go opposite again. I agree with anonymous #47….Who cares what the percentages are. Live….let live….and love it…whether you are born desiring the same sex or it is a choice. Either way, we all deserve equal rights. Agree?

Batul:  I think that we all can say the same thing in one way or another. And Madaline’s right….we don’t get another life. Don’t let anyone’s desire for you to not have what you want, interfere with getting what you want.

I’m happy that all of you like the tribute to Michael Jackson. Thank you for your kind words. You all had some very wonderful things to say about him too. I didn’t want to mention the accusations as I wanted to focus on just him as a loving, talented person but I knew my readers would address the subject, and I was hoping that you would.

I was never sure if he was innocent from all that he was accused of, but I felt that his actions were innocent, if that makes sense. I never saw him as more than a child myself so it was difficult for me to fathom any loving contact that he had with children as anything more than just pure love. Even if there was sexual nuances, my mind only viewed them as explorations between two children as I never thought of him as an adult….so whatever contact there was seemed pure and innocent. I know that may sound strange as I do not condone pedophiliac behavior but I just didn’t feel that this was a man making advances at a boy, if in fact he ever did, which I seriously doubt he did.

Michael never had a childhood and only wanted to give what he never got. Unfortunately I believe that his love and kindness was greedily taken advantage of. Now I read that the boy, whose father had accused Michael of sexual contact with his son, and who sued and won millions, has now come clean and confessed that Michael never touched him that way. The guilt this child, now a young man, has had to live with for over 10 years because of his father’s greed. And now, in my mind his actions were no doubt a catalyst for Michael’s death – Michael never got over the accusations…his life was spiraling in a downward turn during and after the trials. Can you imagine having the ability to give what he was able to give to children and have it all backfire? He innocently loved and society could not accept his way of showing his love.  It is just so sad and unfortunate.

Zen Lill: I love watching Michael and the Jackson Five sing ABC. The costumes were outrageous! I remember watching the Jackson Five cartoon too – what a hoot that was.  You also brought up Farrah Fawcett’s death  – thanks for mentioning her. I was going to include her in my write yesterday but it didn’t feel right. But Farrah too was an icon. “Charlie’s Angels” was one of my favorite shows. It was the beginning of ‘women power’…and we must not forget her famous hairstyle, that every young girl and woman at that time had to have. Moi included.

Anonz:  Good to hear from you – It has been awhile. Thanks for taking the time to write in – You are good yes?

Robert: I have seen this video before and yes, I agree,  it is still good. Thanks for posting.

And your article….wow. I  learned so much from that read – Thank you for posting that too.  I think this is very much needed. It needs to be recognized that this time in our history is an atrocity that should never have happened. But it did. It very much did. And the ripples that continue need to come to a halt.

And on that note I am halting my write and starting my day. Although late, and posting has been a bitch today, feel lucky that I am able to post at all these days. I have been trying for hours. I look forward to connecting in any way…

…Peace out….

Gratefully your blog host,

michelle

Aka BABE: Your Bad Ass Bitch Editor

For archives dated before January 17, 2008 click on my Blogroll:

or click here: “A Day in the life of…”

All content on this site are property of Michelle Moquin © copyright 2009

" Politics, god, Life, News, Music, Family, Personal, Travel, Random, Photography, Religion, Aliens, Art, Entertainment, Food, Books, Thoughts, Media, Culture, Love, Sex, Poetry, Prose, Friends, Technology, Humor, Health, Writing, Events, Movies, Sports, Video, Christianity, Atheist, Blogging, History, Work, Education, Business, Fashion, Barack Obama, People, Internet, Relationships, Faith, Photos, Videos, Hillary Clinton, School, Reviews, God, TV, Philosophy, Fun, Science, Environment, Design, The Page, Rants, Pictures, Church, Blog, Nature, Marketing, Television, Democrats, Parenting, Miscellaneous, Current Events, Film, Spirituality, Obama, Musings, Home, Human Rights, Society, Comedy, Me, Random Thoughts, Research, Government, Election 2008, Baseball, Opinion, Recipes, Children, Iraq, Funny, Women, Economics, America, Misc, Commentary, John McCain, Reflections, All, Celebrities, Inspiration, Lifestyle, Theology, Linux, Kids, Games, World, India, Literature, China, Ramblings, Fitness, Money, Review, War, Articles, Economy, Journal, Quotes, NBA, Crime, Anime, Islam, 2008, Stories, Prayer, Diary, Jesus, Buddha, Muslim, Israel, Europe, Links, Marriage, Fiction, American Idol, Software, Leadership, Pop culture, Rants, Video Games, Republicans, Updates, Political, Football, Healing, Blogs, Shopping, USA, Class, Matrix, Course, Work, Web 2.0, My Life, Psychology, Gay, Happiness, Advertising, Field Hockey, Hip-hop, sex, fucking, ass, Soccer, sox"

Ah Penny:  I really didn’t have much time to address your comments yesterday but I really can not let another day go by without saying something. I mean, I have to say….your mormon faith is huge in this country. And the people who practice this faith are very influential. It is scary. And it is women like yourself who are preventing women from being voted into office. Because guess what? You’re obeying your man and voting for whomever he says you should vote for….most likely not women. Although women like Palin is not what we’re after in office either.

Yes, women need to get off of their asses and start supporting women that support women and our rights….our equality. We can not afford complacency, but we also cannot afford women who don’t have a mind of their own, nor ones that do and don’t use it. And when you talk the way you do, I just wonder if you have decided this all on your own (I seriously doubt that) or are you just succumbing to what you have been told God wants of you, by men, and taking your place in line as the secret third. How about a little self respect for number one ?- yourself.

My suggestion, and as much as I wish for it to sink it, I know how strong faith in something can be, is for you to start thinking about what you want. Start using that brain that God gave you.  If you don’t want to get an abortion, fine. But let that be your decision, not just some words stuffed into your head taking up all of the space….not allowing you to think and use your brain. Use it. You might find that you are perfectly capable of making your own decisions…you might find that you have something to add to this society instead of just being brainwashed into conformity and subservience.

Al: Like your sharp words, your apologies are empty…they don’t mean anything to me because the past tells me that it will happen again and again. What I do appreciate is your humor – always have and most likely always will. Keep it coming – you make me laugh.

Marget: I love this blog too and I plan on being around for awhile :) Thanks ZL for the back – up :)

Roy: I do not see how you can say that you are not a bigot or a racist. Have you looked up the definition of those words? If you did you would notice right next to the definitions, George’s picture. And right below that a picture of you.

George: I think you have met your match.

Mekka: Thank you but I have done nothing. I was just following Anna’s lead. You can thank Anna for putting you on the map in Portland. I have just provided a venue for her to do so.

Jane: You are so right on. These repugnicants in congress do claim to be the ‘moral right’ and they do so by joining the ‘Promise club’. You know…the club that says, ‘I promise not to cheat on my wife.’ And then they condemn others who do have affairs, like they are so innocent. Yeah they claim to uphold their promises, until they are caught with their pants down. So much for their morals being intact, not to mention their balls :).

Some men cheat. You might even say that most men do. But don’t go claiming that you are a saint…don’t go joining the ‘promise club’ when you are being just as sneaky as the next guy. So much for practicing what you preach. Why is it that the people who claim to be so moral are the ones that end up with none? I guess they’ve been hangin’ out with the same people who preach that homosexuality is not natural or good, yet they are secretly gay themselves and gettin’ it good.

Drew: Thanks for sharing that example. Yes racism was invited into office by the people’s votes. And Murphy…you are correct about us putting in racist and then pretending that we don’t know that we are. What does that say? I also think you have raised a smart and preceptive son.

Lebon: There is no difference except the Iranians are standing up and doing something about it. We are doing nothing. More people need to recognize these atrocities that otw’s go through on a daily basis and fight for them. It is inhumane and cruel. If you cannot condone the behavior, what will you do that is different from what you usually do? We all need to change and take more action in support.

Anonymous: I am sorry to hear about your sister. Madaline will not go back on her promise. You will get the help that you need. I wish you good luck and success with the regime.

And on that note, I’ve got to go.

Peace out….

Gratefully your blog host,

michelle

Aka BABE: Your Bad Ass Bitch Editor

For archives dated before January 17, 2008 click below:

“A Day in the life of…”

All content on this site are property of Michelle Moquin © copyright 2009

" Politics, god, Life, News, Music, Family, Personal, Travel, Random, Photography, Religion, Aliens, Art, Entertainment, Food, Books, Thoughts, Media, Culture, Love, Sex, Poetry, Prose, Friends, Technology, Humor, Health, Writing, Events, Movies, Sports, Video, Christianity, Atheist, Blogging, History, Work, Education, Business, Fashion, Barack Obama, People, Internet, Relationships, Faith, Photos, Videos, Hillary Clinton, School, Reviews, God, TV, Philosophy, Fun, Science, Environment, Design, The Page, Rants, Pictures, Church, Blog, Nature, Marketing, Television, Democrats, Parenting, Miscellaneous, Current Events, Film, Spirituality, Obama, Musings, Home, Human Rights, Society, Comedy, Me, Random Thoughts, Research, Government, Election 2008, Baseball, Opinion, Recipes, Children, Iraq, Funny, Women, Economics, America, Misc, Commentary, John McCain, Reflections, All, Celebrities, Inspiration, Lifestyle, Theology, Linux, Kids, Games, World, India, Literature, China, Ramblings, Fitness, Money, Review, War, Articles, Economy, Journal, Quotes, NBA, Crime, Anime, Islam, 2008, Stories, Prayer, Diary, Jesus, Buddha, Muslim, Israel, Europe, Links, Marriage, Fiction, American Idol, Software, Leadership, Pop culture, Rants, Video Games, Republicans, Updates, Political, Football, Healing, Blogs, Shopping, USA, Class, Matrix, Course, Work, Web 2.0, My Life, Psychology, Gay, Happiness, Advertising, Field Hockey, Hip-hop, sex, fucking, ass, Soccer, sox"